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jezzer · Nov 18, 2011, 02:42 AM

I'm a first-time dog owner with a 7 month old puppy who has had a challenging start to life. I have read/watched a lot of material on when one should not make eye contact with your dog (eg. When it's misbehaving to get your attention) but I'm now confused about when you CAN make eye contact. I've heard it can be taken as threatening by the dog. Is it OK to make eye contact when giving it praise and a cuddle? Some clarity on this issue from folks who understand dog/pack psychology would be really helpful.

JudyKayTee · Nov 18, 2011, 07:14 AM

It's YOUR dog - how long have you had him/her? I have had a number of abused/rescue dogs. I have always made eye contact with them. I do NOT make eye contact with dogs I do not know.

You say the dog had a challenging start to life. In what manner? Physical abuse? Something else?

I don't stare my dogs down - they look at me, I look at them. In the beginning if they appear skiddish I look away.

I've read the info you have apparently read but I have always thought that meant dogs you do not own or live with. I don't know how you can interact with a dog if you don't make eye contact.

jezzer · Nov 18, 2011, 08:54 AM

Thanks. We believe he was crated for too long as a pup, by a family who really didn't have time for him and maybe struck, possibly by unsupervised children, given the indirect feedback we had from the breeder, to whom the puppy was returned at about 5-6m old. We've had him about a month now. He's settling in slowly, with plenty of TLC, but can be very nervy and isn't keen to go out for walks.

We watched the Dog Listener DVD, which talks a lot about when not to make eye contact with your dog, particularly when it's misbehaving or thinks it's pack leader. It's an eye-opener (if you forgive the pun) but not clear about when it's OK to make eye contact.

ballengerb1 · Nov 18, 2011, 09:01 AM

What all of Ceasar's vidoes. Eye contact is only a speck of sand in his training methods. It would also be a great idea for you folks to go through obedience training. It would buiold your and your dogs confidence and trust.

jezzer · Nov 18, 2011, 09:11 AM

Thanks. Do you have a link to Caesar's stuff that you could post here for me?

ballengerb1 · Nov 18, 2011, 09:21 AM

I dvr his program on Natgeo channel on DISH. You can buy his books watch videos. Cesar Millan - Watch Cesar Millan Videos and Clips | VideoSurf Video Search

Lucky098 · Nov 19, 2011, 03:00 PM

Eye contact is important for a healthy relationship between owner and pet.

I would suggest to sign up for some dog classes with a good dog trainer to help you through your struggles as a first time dog owner. You can find good trainers through your vet, friends with pets, shelters and so on.. I'm not a fan of the training techniques petsmart and petco push, but they are still better than nothing.

With eye contact, that doesn't mean you look them directly in the eye. That is intimidating and will either frighten a timid dog, or act as a challenge to a more abrasive dog. Dogs are not like people, don't don't need to stare them in the eye to know you have their attention. They need to look into your face.

The first training technique I would suggest would be "watch me". Its builds trust between you and your dog, starts to build the confidence of your dog looking you in the face (which is unnatural) and the building blocks to obedience training.

What you do... take a piece of treat.. Let him sniff it... Let him lick it... Maybe give him a small taste.. Then bring the treat up right under your chin and say "watch me" in a very happy, up beat tone of voice.

Don't lean over the dog... that is scary. Stand up straight or get down to his level. Look at his nose, his forehead or something behind him.. But keep an eye on what his eyes are doing. You want his eyes to meet yours. It'll only be a second at first.. the minute you get that contact, then give him a treat.

What that is doing, is teaching him that eye contact is not threatening in any way. That direct eye contact between the two of you means that something fun is going to happen.

Timid dogs will have a hard time doing this. Its scary to them because they are not natural leaders. They do get over it though. The more abrasive and brave dogs get this technique very fast.. But keep in mind, if your dog understands this command quickly, doesn't make him dominating over you or that he going to be aggressive towards you.. it just means that he is more sure of himself and that he is looking for a leader to follow or be equal to (which is why I also suggest a trainer). Packs have two leaders.. Beta and Alpha.. Beta is maybe a mili-step down from alpha, but they are very much equals. So being alpha is a must.. but your dog might want to become beta ;)

But like I said.. don't lean over your dog starting at him. That is very intimidating... Just stand naturally and guide his eyesight to your face.