[Sofiana]

Hello,
I am a mother of 8mo year old. I am not married, nor I was ever to her bio father. We are about to separate now and he is on her birth certificate as well as she has both of out last names. If a father was to give up all of his parental rights (what he is planning to do, willingly), would it be OK and how hard is the process to take him off, completely from her Birth records and change her last name just to mine?
Also, if he is giving up his rights, and I get married to different man that is not her bio father, would adoption process be easy, since he would not need to sign anything or give any consent, correct?
Hope someone went through this and can tell me how it went on.
Thank you.

[kcomissiong]

The problem you are going to run into is that he just can't give up his rights at will. It seems to be a very common misconception that this can happen. He must either be stripped of them by the court (and you have to seriously do some bad for that to happen) or voluntarily terminate in conjunction with an adoption (both of you lose the child) or step-parent adoption, where your spouse adopts in his place and receives all of his rights and responsibilities. You did not mention your location, but in many places you must be married for at least a year and he must consent for a step-parent adoption to happen.

[Synnen]

I would like to add that you should really keep SOME records of him for your child anyway.

Your child has a right to his or her medical background, and genetic background.

In addition, if you LIE to the child about his or her biological background, it WILL come back to haunt you.

Your ex can't give up his rights, and in most states you need to be married a year before the courts will even consider a step-parent adoption which would allow your ex to pass his rights to your new spouse.

Really--basically neither of you can erase the fact that you did indeed have sex with and conceive a child together