I don't have proof of any statement from COBRA saying that you must notify them if you get SS and Medicare, but you do, and it stands to reason that you would so that coverage is not duplicated. I don't know if you can appeal or not, or what would happen if you paid a lawyer to appeal for you.
I can say gather your financial papers together and go to the nearest state benefits office to see if she qualifies for Medicaid. If you do have assets (your home doesn't count, and a car under a certain value) over the limit, then look into Medicare supplement plans such as from AARP.
Also be clear about what medications are covered under Medicare, Medicaid, and any other plans. Many states have their own for people who fall through the cracks. You will have choices of carriers and they are different, and there are deadlines for signing up. If it's all too confusing, call around to senior centers and the town social worker.
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