[hydra665]

First let me say, it's safe to say we're both in love with in each other on a mutual level. We've had our very rocky days in the past, but have worked it out and remained faithful to each other. We've come to realize we work well together.

But there is something that she does, that continues to pester me for no known reason other than giving me a hard time. She knows a girl at the college she goes to who I used to like because I told her about her. We were talking casually, when she says, "You know, the girl you used to like doesn't even look good, so I was thinking what is wrong with you?" I say, "whatever", and say "it's irrelevant to anything, so why bother discussing it?" I try to change the topic and she continues, "Oh, so you're trying to change the topic huh?"

I'm a person who likes to focus in the present, but she often obsesses over my past, whether it be exes or people that I used to like. I've continually told her that past relationships do not matter nor do they have any ground in how I feel about her today. Still, again and again, she pesters me about my past relationships. How should I approach this?

[talaniman]

Sometimes you just need a thicker skin, or a sense of humor. Then you can deal with those that try to mess with you and get a reaction, with no reaction, which drives them crazy, or a sharp retort.

This is nothing more than a jab for attention, or affection. So don't get mad, or frustrated, get creative. Wonder why she wants a rise out of you? Are you a humorless geek or something?

[pandead]

I honestly think it's her way to cope with your past (unfortunately, I used to do that too) because she is trying hard to accept it and prove you she is open minded enough to talk/joke about it. I used to talk the same way about my ex's ex-girlfriend(s) and hope he would see how awesome I was compared to them.

It's just my opinion (we are not the same person after all) but little words of comfort work wonders on insecurities. Good luck!

[talaniman]

I honestly think it's her way to cope with your past (unfortunately, I used to do that too) because she is trying hard to accept it and prove you she is open minded enough to talk/joke about it. I used to talk the exact same way about my ex's ex-girlfriend(s) and hope he would see how awesome I was compared to them.

It's just my opinion (we are not the same person after all) but little words of comfort work wonders on insecurities. Good luck!

Great insights, I agree 100%, kind reasurance is what she is after. Give them to her.