Check out some similar questions!

frogger17 · Oct 6, 2011, 01:55 PM

So this guy that I've known for a while & dated just recently told me to leave him alone. His reason was because I lied and I hung with his best friend. Here's the story...

Saturday, October 1: The guy who I've known for a while came over to hang out. We broke up July 30th but have been working to get back together. It was cool then he had left & I had passed out. At like 12 something at night I get a call from his best friend who I haven't talked to since August cause he didn't want to be my friend anymore. So we talked & all he kept doing was telling me things about the other guy. Then his phone died. Then he texts me at 2 something & was like I'm bored let's hang out. So he came over & we talked about the guy I've know for a while. He then told me I want to be friends again so keep this away from the other guy cause it will be drama so I did. I was so mad at what he was telling me. So he left & I wanted to find out the truth.
Sunday, October 2: I call my ex over to ask him these things, I didn't use the other guy's name cause I didn't want them fighting cause of me. So I kept it a secret. It made us fight & he was being complicated.
Monday, October 3: I still haven't told him who it was & he was wanting to know. He stopped texting me for the night but I had texted him if you want to know, text me in the morning & I'd tell you.
Tuesday, October 4: I'm still in high school & I text my ex about 3 times that day & he doesn't respond. Later on that day, his best friend texted me this long message basically saying I can't believe you told your ex that I told you all these things. And I had told him look I didn't use your name. Then my ex texts me & was like was it my best friend. I didn't know what he meant but his best friend was like I told your ex I called you drunk & that's how you found out & told me to go along with that story & I did. Then my ex tells me to never talk to him again & I started to cry & what not. I then told him everything that happened up until that day. He basically called me a liar & I told him I only lied to keep your friend from hating me & you guys fighting. Then he said I don't want to talk to you anymore & leave me alone. So I told him okay I guess I'm sorry for whatever I did wrong & what not. Right after that his best friend told me I don't want to be in the middle of this. I told him you're only in the middle cause you opened your mouth to me and him so I told his best friend to never speak to me again.

Since Tuesday, my ex has not talked to me & I mean like if your "bestfriend" can talk behind your back & still be in your life, then dang, I should be too. I just think it was totally stupid for not talking to me anymore.

My questions are:

1) What do I do to not think of it so much? Because that's all I can do. But when I do think, it just makes me cry.

2) Is this "leave me alone" thing for good or is it just for now? I don't know whether he was like never ever ever again or don't talk to me until I talk to you.

HELP PLEASE "/

Jake2008 · Oct 7, 2011, 05:57 AM

I think there might be more confusion to this story than you have already stated.

For a friend of your boyfriend to say rotten things to you to undermine your relationship, has a purpose, and a plan behind it.

He is probably interested in you, and is trying to turn you away from your boyfriend.

A rule of thumb I live by, is I don't gossip, and I don't keep dirty secret conversations. Next time when someone says not to tell so and so who gave you 'the dirt', tell that person if they want to talk, you don't keep secrets. That will put an end to the backdoor nonsense.

Your boyfriend is understandably upset. If the situation were the reverse, you would be too.

You only came clean when push came to shove, with information that he should have known without guessing and fighting with you over, to get it.

What you have done, is broken trust. Once that is gone from a relationship, there is usually no turning back.

frogger17 · Oct 7, 2011, 06:20 AM

His best friend did tell that he liked me but I ignored it. But is he done talking to me for good?

Jake2008 · Oct 7, 2011, 10:29 AM

I wouldn't trust any information third hand.

My advice to you is to leave it alone for now. Stop contact if you haven't already- no texts, phone calls etc. Give yourself a week.

If he calls you, then you can start again. If he doesn't, it's time to move on.

Best of luck.

mcinorg · Oct 7, 2011, 04:47 PM

Things have to cool down before anything can move forward. Space is needed to deal with all emotions. Something strange about the best friend coming back into the picture after the ex returned. Focus on you and your life. It is ahead of you. It takes just as many steps to get out of the forest as it took to go into the forest. Stay away from them both. When the time is right, the ex will resurface. You then will have a choice of continuing the relation or not. The "best friend" appears to be too untrustworthy of your trust. Let him go by not spending any time with explanations or defensive chat. You're better than the them both. Focus on self, the rest will come to view.