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lalo_007 · Sep 30, 2011, 08:46 AM

Me and this guy have so much fun together, just don't understand why wouldn't he want something with me. He said he was ready for a relationship a few months back but the lady hurt him. Now I'm stuck on wanting something that just feels like its not going anywhere. I'm hurt, I have so much to offer and he is a great guy. When we spend time together everything seems right. We text each other every day. Sex is the best he says.. Can someone help me.. I'm about to just let go of the sex part and be friends.

Wondergirl · Sep 30, 2011, 09:13 AM

Your thinking is on the right track. Stop having sex and put your effort into building a relationship, an emotional connection.

If you need support for and help with that, please post again.

0rphan · Sep 30, 2011, 09:22 AM

Hi,lalo

I think you and this guy have a good thing going at the moment.I can't see how you can just go back to being friends.Once sex is brought into it, there is no going back to just friends,you'll loose him altogether.

The reason that it works so well right now is because he feels that there is no pressure,he can enjoy your company, your time together and the sexual side as well.He can be totally himself,knowing that you are aware of this.

The problem you have now, is the fact that your feelings have obviously changed towards him,so now you want more.It could be that he feels the same,however for now, would prefer to keep it to himself.

The way I see it is you have three choices here;

1)You can tell him how you feel and what your hopes and dreams are for the future.. by doing this you may scare him off and loose him forever.

2)You can remain quiet,carry on with the current situation hoping that things between you will develop naturally,you fall in love with each other, both of you have a happy ending.

3)You can also,finish with him completely now, and look for somebody else who wishes to committ to a full on relationship.

Personally Lalo,I would opt for number 2,you have nothing to loose,your still having a great time, plus the sexual side is also brilliant, with a guy you care for and there's a good chance that it may lead to something more.

talaniman · Sep 30, 2011, 03:12 PM

To late to be just friends without the benefits. But not to late to tell him the truth about what you want from him, and be ready to cut him loose if he can't get with it.

vanheart · Oct 2, 2011, 04:57 PM

" just don't understand why wouldn't he want something with me"

He doesn't. Just sex.

"Now I'm stuck on wanting something that just feels like its not going anywhere"

Don't be stuck. Use your gut. You've just said it.

He doesn't really want what you want, there's no long run for him.
FWB, remember?

Hookup when..

Either enjoy being FWB or split. Can't have both.
That's the whole point.

Don't force it.