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marissa14 · Sep 12, 2011, 08:41 PM

I'm 14 and in love with my brothers best friend (A) he's 18, My brother had a job with my dad for a long time and he decided to give (A) a job so every weekend he comes to my house with my brothers and we laugh and talk about stuff we have fun together I think anyway, The thing is I don't know what to do because he's 18 and my brothers best friend and I don't know what to say to him or what to do I know it sounds crazy saying I'm in love at 14 but I really think I am I never felt this way about any other guy... PLEASE HELP

Jake2008 · Sep 13, 2011, 02:33 AM

While I understand that you can't help the way you feel, there are many reasons you should not take this any further.

While you may think this is love, it is not. It is a crush or infatuation. Love happens when a relationship develops after two people know each other well enough to decide together, that love is developing. Love isn't from a distance, or silent, or hidden, or one-sided.

The feelings you have for him are based on, partly, your age. You feel an attraction to the opposite sex- quite a natural development. Something about him, makes these feelings come to life and the little things like joking with him, are what you are basing 'love' on. Again, that is not love, it is a crush.

He is a man at 18, and you have to realize that you are a minor child, at 14. There are not many parents who would approve of their 14 year old dating, let alone dating an adult. And there are good reasons laws are in place to also make that distinction.

While you have strong feelings for him, it is best to realize that he is off limits, and soon enough, you'll be dating boys more proportionate to your age and maturity.

Rhyme4NoReason · Oct 10, 2011, 10:39 PM

That's too cute. I remember being "in love" with my brothers best friend around your age. But you know what, I think I was more infatuated with the thought that an older (extremely cute) boy gave me attention. I'm not belittling what you say you feel, but give it time. Let him come out with it if he likes you. Plus, he's 18. Depending where you live, it's illegal for him to do anything. I'm sure if you two are meant to be, you'll be together, but the timing has to be right. And from the sound of it, the timing is 4 years too early. Stay strong young one. There's a guy out there for you, I promise.

justnotsure · Oct 11, 2011, 07:08 PM

Don't limit yourself to just him. There's no sense in automatically pledging your loyalty to someone you already know could cause a problem. Keep in mind he probably has interests in other women closer to his age he can legally have sex with. Try your best not to get more involved than you already are. You may also want to keep control of your emotions so you don't seem obsessive and make him uncomfortable. First love can get that way.