[mumneedshelp]

Hi,

My son is 2 years and 8 months old. He also has a sister few years older than him. He has developed everything slightly slow. Example, he started walking when he was 16 months old. He has been looked after four days a week by mom-in-law and he hardly/never goes out in those time so watches children TV a lot. I take him to toddlers once a week and we speak two languages at home.

He only said 4 or 5 words during his two years. He has been calling us mummy and daddy since his second birthday. He sometimes confuses with mummy and daddy, and he calls his grandma and me 'daddy'. But he is recently using text book words a lot. Example he is well thorough with his a-z flash cards, and he says hard words like Igloo, Nest, and Dinosaur etc if I show him the cards and pictures. He is very intelligent that if I give him any toys, he figures out how to play with it by finding buttons etc. He sings twinkle, twinkle little star with exact tune with 80% correct words also few more rhymes. He counts from 1- 10 very well. If I ask how many marble does he have, he says the answer by counting them. Besides, he has got good sense of humor (he laughs when he sees something funny, he laughs out for funny cartoons). Even he understands requests/orders example if I say to him that 'it is tidy up time' he puts away his toys, and If I ask him to bring his shoes and he does so. He is also hyper active.

However, he sometimes makes growling noises if he is frustrated. He is recently coping words from his sister but he does not seem using the words in his own way. If I say good morning and his 'name' he repeats same rather than saying 'good morning mummy'. Also he does not want to listen sometimes ( example he won't even respond to his name however it has been improving a lot recently). If he takes a thing/toy from a place, he put it back where it belongs once he is done with it, he won't even give it to me even if I ask. That is an extraordinary character I have seen among children. Also he does not want to wear his left sock, 50% of the times he removes it and walking with right sock on.

After considering everything, I spoke to my health visitor about him and she is going to send him to be examined. But I am thinking - is it me, worried too much? Me overacting? Or does he really need help?

Please anyone/ anyone experiencing the same problem, advice me so that I can put my mind at rest.

[Wondergirl]

The language problem and echoing back what you say to him MAY indicate mild autism. Write down any odd thing you notice and at your next doctor visit, ask his doctor.

My older son is autistic, so he prefers to be alone than be with other kids or people, feels safest at home, would arrange his toys in a certain order or line them up carefully (he has always been very tidy), doesn't like changes in his routine, likes to wrap himself up in a blanket to soothe himself, doesn't like tags in his clothes (they irritate his skin, he says), and doesn't make good eye contact or like to be touched. He's very smart and good-natured and loves books. He was our "little professor" when he was small. He has a "photographic memory" and remembers everything he sees and reads. He remembers things that I have long forgotten, like when we bought our refrigerator or which winter we had the most cold and snow.

Treat him just like you are and love him and don't shame him EVER. Gently correct him with a smile and a hug. If there is something not quite "normal" about him (and who of us is really normal?? ), bring it up to the doctor. It sounds like you are a good mum who is doing a good job of raising him.

Please post here again as time goes on, if you can tell us more or find out from a doctor if anything is going on with your son.

[QLP]

From what you have written I think it's impossible to say, but would certainly be worth going ahead with checking things out so you can either put your mind at rest or if there is a problem you will know you are doing everything you can for that problem. Please try not to panic though.

My son was way ahead in some things and slower than average in others as a young child and this persisted throughout his life but he would be classed as 'normal'. He is in his twenties now and made a career from his amazing maths ability but still phones mum and dad to ask for instructions on simple everyday tasks. The only diagnosis he ever got was 'gifted' but I think he just has different skill levels in different things. He went through a spell as a toddler when the only thing he would wear, and I mean the only thing, was a pair of red wellies. Naturally I had to insist otherwise if we were going out, but if he was just playing at home I saw no harm in letting him enjoy whatever it was he liked about this. He did grow out of it fortunately lol. I had a friend who was bilinguial and her son barely spoke until he was three but then became very fluent in both languages very quickly. I think he spent a lot of time making sense of things in his own head before feeling ready to communicate properly.

Like I say, hard to call, but I hope you get some answers soon and I too think you're doing a great job.

[jenniepepsi]

Definitely have your child seen and checked, all of these can point to a number of things (autism, global delay, aspergers) But they could also simply be that he is a typical child who is developing a little bit later than his sibling. All children develop at their own pace, there is not RIGHT way to develop or right TIME.

But absolutely take him to the doctor, bring up your concerns, and see if his doctor is concerned about any of these delays. Good luck!