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Justwhy · Jul 18, 2011, 08:51 PM

My hubby and I just celebrated our 31st wedding anniversary.I love him with all my heart and I know he loves me. Their have been no adultery or jelousy of other people friends etc. but through the years when he gets mad he says things like ooo you only listen to your sons (they are both ours) your sons are perfect etc etc... My our sons are 26 and 30. My hubby was never the disiplenarian. He has also been stand offish when it came to going to the school for anything when they attended school. He was an over the rd truck driver and so 99 % of things that needed done with them or around the house " I did" I taught our sons most of the guy stuff fixxing cars maintaining a lawn and so on so forth. He has always been encouraging to me and as I said we do love each other but when he says jealous stuff like that I want to string him up by his... THUMBs lol

joypulv · Jul 18, 2011, 09:36 PM

We all have our Achilles Heel, so if most of your life together is good, I'd not worry about it.

I am wondering though - by any chance are these sons still living at home? He might really feel like a 5th wheel with a sort of cozy group of 3, who have shared a lot more together over the years than he ever did with any of you. Do you tend to say 'we think this or that' a lot, meaning the 3 of you, or 'the boys like it this way?' There might be some tiny grounds for jealousy.

But still - I wouldn't worry too much.

Jake2008 · Jul 18, 2011, 10:30 PM

It might be a little bit of guilt talking too.

While you held down the fort and took care of business, he worked. And when he was home, he missed out on a lot by the sounds of things.

Maybe he is angry with himself for not making a better effort to have better relationships with his sons; to have had the satisfaction of seeing them in sports, school activities, etc.

If that's what it is, he can't turn back the clock and live the part of father, over again.

I agree with Joy. If he needs to spew a little anger, it's most likely in a roundabout way, his way of dealing with his own shortcomings and disappointments.

I would let it go too.

bg12795 · Jul 28, 2011, 07:44 PM

Maybe your husband feels like he missed a lot when he was out on the road. Maybe you two should try to do a weekend vacation, just the two of you, to bond and talk about things. When men get jealous, most of the time either they may not realize it, or they may feel horrible about something that they should have been there for. Just try talking to him about it, and see how it works out. Whatever happens, just take a deep breath, and stay calm because a healthy relationship NEEDS good communication to thrive in a household.