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JoeCanada76 · Jul 24, 2011, 02:09 PM

Originally Posted by me2u2

First of you have no right assuming anything. 2nd if u eve had a child in your life you would no when children have fits they do what ever it takes to get what they want wether kick bite slap bang there heads. it does not matter ans long as they get there way. especialy if they are spoiled like my kids. and you would be suprised what a 15month old can do when they are influnced by there older siblings. Another thing my 15month old has never been spanked I am strongly agains it. So dont even speak if you first off dont read what was said properly. I would never hurt any of my children and My son did bang his head on purpose because he didnt get his way. I can't stand when people without kids assume what other kids do or do not do.

Your words, HE THROWS HIMSELF ON THE FLOOR AND HITS HIS HEAD ON WHATEVER IS CLOSEST. That is so suspect to me. I have a child, and he is close to five years old. He is awesome and doing well. You have a major attitude problem. I read carefully everything you wrote and answered appropiately. So you have quite the nerve telling me not to speak, I am answering according to what has been written by you. The issue here is lousy parenting, and in order for you guys to become better parents you need to admit your faults. Seek counseling and parenting classes to learn how to better deal with these circumstances and be willing to change your parenting styles. I do hope that you get some visitors in your home. So they can observe and watch and see how things are going.

me2u2 · Jul 24, 2011, 07:41 PM

Originally Posted by Jesushelper76

Your words, HE THROWS HIMSELF ON THE FLOOR AND HITS HIS HEAD ON WHATEVER IS CLOSEST. That is so suspect to me. I have a child, and he is close to five years old. He is awesome and doing well. You have a major attitude problem. I read carefully everything you wrote and answered appropiately. So you have quite the nerve telling me not to speak, I am answering according to what has been written by you. The issue here is lousy parenting, and in order for you guys to become better parents you need to admit your faults. Seek counseling and parenting classes to learn how to better deal with these circumstances and be willing to change your parenting styles. I do hope that you get some vistors in your home. So they can observe and watch and see how things are going.

What ever you say when he threw himself on the floor in front of the nurse at the hospital that was prooof enogh to every one including the doctors that he has sever tempertantrums and is not abused by us and he never will be abused by us. So are you trying to say if your son falls and hurts himself you should have child protective services called on you if your son gets hurt you must not be a good father to him other wise the situation (god forbid) never happened . W/E

Wondergirl · Jul 24, 2011, 07:48 PM

Originally Posted by me2u2

he has sever tempertantrums

What do you do when he has one?

(My younger brother began having tantrums when he was born, and even before he could walk, would scream and cry and pound his head on the floor until his forehead was bright red.)

Alty · Jul 24, 2011, 07:50 PM

No one has said that you abuse him. We're only saying that your parenting style is leading to this behavior. Before you ask, I do have kids, two of them.

You said that when he bangs his head on the floor you either distract him with TV, or sing to him. He's 15 months old. You're rewarding his behavior.

Have you ever tried just ignoring him? Walk out of the room when he has a fit. Don't talk to him, don't look at him. Nothing. Just pretend he's not there.

He wants a reaction. When you stop reacting, he'll realize that what he's doing won't get him any attention, and he'll stop doing it.

me2u2 · Jul 24, 2011, 07:53 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

What do you do when he has one?

(My younger brother began having tantrums when he was born, and even before he could walk, would scream and cry and pound his head on the floor until his forehead was bright red.)

I usually pick him up and lay him on a soft surface other wise he will head butt me so I put him on a soft surface and sit with him until he get over his fit the I will let him go and play with his sister or sometimes I will go and lay him in his crib for time out until he can control himself

Wondergirl · Jul 24, 2011, 07:55 PM

What did you do with him when he had the tantrum in the hospital, or what if you are in a public place?

me2u2 · Jul 24, 2011, 07:59 PM

Originally Posted by Altenweg

No one has said that you abuse him. We're only saying that your parenting style is leading to this behavior. Before you ask, I do have kids, two of them.

You said that when he bangs his head on the floor you either distract him with tv, or sing to him. He's 15 months old. You're rewarding his behavior.

Have you ever tried just ignoring him? Walk out of the room when he has a fit. Don't talk to him, don't look at him. Nothing. Just pretend he's not there.

He wants a reaction. When you stop reacting, he'll realize that what he's doing won't get him any attention, and he'll stop doing it.

Im just afraid if I ignore him he will end up cracking his head open and/or just cause real harm to himself. I tried ignoring him but he screams louder I understand I am rewarding his negative behavior I just don't want to see him in pain. My frieds son had fits likke my son and banged his head on the wrong thing and ended up in the hospital with 20 stiches.

me2u2 · Jul 24, 2011, 08:01 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

What did you do with him when he had the tantrum in the hospital, or what if you are in a public place?

We take him out side if we are in a store or something but in the hospial the nurse ran and got him ice because his forehead turned black and blue on inpact and got swolled right away

Wondergirl · Jul 24, 2011, 08:06 PM

Originally Posted by me2u2

Im just afraid if I ignore him he will end up cracking his head open and/or just cause real harm to himself. I tried ignoring him but he screams louder

No, don't ignore him. Some years ago when I was taking a child development course, we discussed using weighted blankets or just child-sized fleece blankets and wrapping the tantruming child in one, like in a cocoon. Here's a site I found that talks about that (and sells them, but any fleecy blanket should work) -- Benefits of Using a Weighted Blanket

When I was in the hospital two years ago and was very cold, a nurse wrapped a heavy, pre-warmed blanket around me, and oh man, did that feel good -- secure and safe! So maybe the blanket-wrapping would work for your son. Don't fling it on him, but hold it open in front of him and tell him sweetly what you want to do, maybe sing a blanket song (make one up?). Or even better, do some dry runs when he is in a good mood, so he knows what the blanket is for, that you will "cocoon" him and how good it will feel. Then hold him and rock him.

JoeCanada76 · Jul 24, 2011, 09:25 PM

Just saying that you need counseling and guidance on being better parents. Not one time did I mention abuse, but that is what your conclusion came too. There are many programs out there for parents, new and old alike. They make home visits. They guide and teach and observe and recommend on how to approve and commend you on what you are doing well.

1) Counseling for parents, check. Are you willing?
2) Home visitors from different programs that will help and guide you in better parenting choices and styles. Are you willing?
3) Change in attitude and approach is very important here.

Babies and toddlers and kids falls, they hurt themselves but never once have my son ever did anything so called on purpose. 15 months is kind of young to be CONTROLLING YOUR CHILD. Control is not a good word to use, and you used it.

So I suggest you re read through all your posts and also re read through all of your answers and be open to change or your going to continue having problems with your children.