[mogrann]

I did it I quit my job last night at McDonalds. In fact I walked out in the middle of my shift. I had a customer arguing and calling me names(not sure if I can post them but sufface to say they were the four letter varieties) over her having to wait for someone to run downstairs to get her mc chicken sauce . She also had wanted two wraps and my co worker had only rang in one so they gave her one free. During the abuse I took off my head set and said that is it I quit. I then called hubby to come and get me.
Last week I had wrote a letter to my boss explaining my issues with overnights and how I wanted day shifts. She ignored it and kept me on nights. I have been talking to my therapists and she actually helped me write the letter.

I was finding nights way to stressful with the drunks and rude people. I have been called so many names and have even seen a female employee grabbed so hard it left bruises. Management will not call police or refuse service so it became a unsafe work environment, in my opinion.

My therapist encouraged me to use DEARMAN when writing the letter. I really think I should have kept my mouth shut and just done my job. Though a month ago I went through a high anxiety time, I was suicidal and almost hospitalized, due to work.

I feel bad for walking out. I am actually having a panic attack about it. I am glad in a way I have therapy later today as my urges to SI and my SU thinking or on the rise. Was this part of my borderline personality disorder? Did I do the wrong thing?

I kind of want to call work and see what they say. Then I am also scared to call work and hear what they say. What do I do? I feel like such a stupid person for doing this.

My thoughts are all over the place and I am sorry if my post is not clear. I do try normally to stay focused but just not able to today.

[Enigma1999]

First off, I am sorry to hear that you quit your job?

Do I think you did the wrong thing? It's really hard to say. I don't like hearing that you as well as other employees have to endure such bad behavior from the night time customers. To top it off, that NOTHING is being done about it. That sickens me.

I used to own a restaurant, and let me tell you, that was extremely hard. Hard to accommidate customers, EVEN if I knew they were wrong. Fortunatley I didn't have the kind of abuse you seem to have to deal with.

Perhaps you should call and speak to your manager. Tell her what you shared with us, and that you do want to continue working there, you just feel unsafe and uneasy about working nights.

I would give it a try.

I ask you though, is working there REALLY what you want?

Or is it other things that is going on in your life that is making you stress out about work?

[white-rose]

It probably would have been more responsible to talk to someone about why you were quitting. They can't get mad at you or not understand especially what you have been subjected to as an employee. You should never have to endure abuse from ANYONE. You are protected by human rights and have the right to quit your job if you feel threatened or uncomfortable or disrespected in anyway. I'm sure your employer hasn't thought much about you leaving, you are replacable. But despite that, it would have been beneficial to you to talk to your employer about the issues you were experiancing, and it might have made the situation better, or made it so it didn't happen to another employee in the future.

[BK201]

Health stands first. Nothing else matters. That McD job took a toll on of your health, and you did not really like it. All is for good. Suggest venturing other jobs.

[Jake2008]

Dialectical therapy, like any therapy, is not meant to tell you what to do- it is to offer you an option, and teach you the skills you need, should you choose, for example The Dearman 'tool' you mentioned, in order to be better able to assert yourself constructively, to solve problems.

But, the choice is yours. That you immediately regretted your decision, and that has caused further stress, and that you are in therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder, my advice to you is to discuss exactly how you felt when you walked out of your job, and how you have been feeling afterward.

You may have quit for all the right reasons, but you are missing the piece that allows you to feel confident that you did the right thing, and that you can move onto better, less stressful employment, with more confidence in being able to identify and deal with your needs. Nothing you have said about the reasons you quit seemed unjustifiable to me in the least.

I don't know you well enough to know why you doubt your decision, or whether there was anything else you could have done, but I get the impression that without Management accommodating you for dayshifts (even after a written request), and the extreme nature of the job you did, was there any other choice? Do you think that things would have been better, or worse, if you had stayed.

It's nice to think that we all have the opportunity to put in two weeks notice, and can let all the bad stuff roll off our backs and not be bothered by it, but the truth is, most people have faced situations where there was no choice except to realize, it's time to go.

Talk it all through with your therapist and see what he/she recommends next. I am happy you are in therapy, and doing all the right things to work through this situation.

All the best of luck to you.

[mogrann]

Thank you all for your answers. I did discuss this with my therapist and we came up with a few things.
1. I called work to apologize for how I quit, not for quitting. I believe I should have finished the shift and then left. When I called I had to tell them over and over again that due to safety concerns I would not be back to nights. I guess they thought I would be back to work. They want me to call the store manager next week to talk to her(she is away this week).

2. Due to my jobs causing me two big setbacks in therapy. My therapist explained that this could be good as she considered this job as therapy interferring. We had been discussing me leaving the job once I found another job, but I had been putting it off due to anxiety.

3. I have contracted with my therapist to call for help if I need it and not to hurt myself. We did discuss IP but are trying using skills to get me through this.

4. I am regretting this decision as I always second guess things I do. I also don't like sticking up for myself as it feels wrong.

I am doing okay little less stressed out now. I have been working on skills and do have group on Wednesday.

Thank you again.

[Fr_Chuck]

The issue I see is what are you by company policy suppose to do if you are being cursed by customer, call the manager, refuse to wait on them , ask them to leave ? What was the policy, I am sure allowing yourself to be cursed is not policy.

In my work if someone is rude, I merely refuse to wait on them, leave their home and so on. My company will back me up.

[mogrann]

We are not given options but were told to wait on them. I have never seen anyone refused service or the police called.

[Fr_Chuck]

McDonalds have a manual, same one in every store in every place in America ( from what I understand)

There are also laws on hostile work place, even from customers.

Perhaps someone should send a copy of this question to the Ronald or someone at corporate and see if they can explain what their policy is.

[mogrann]

UPDATE:

I still have a job. I am in shock over that one. I have not worked there in two weeks. I did call the store manager and her managers had told her nothing about what had happened(she was on vacation). I had to say over and over I am not working nights. (part of DEAR MAN). She then asked to me to call back this week which I did. I am now working no later than midnight.
I am thinking now that I have taken a step back that I still have the job due to me being mindful. I was not rude, argumentive, calling names etc. I stated the facts on what happened and what my bottom line was. I guess these skills do work though they are hard to get used to using.

[BK201]

Nice to hear that you have settled in McD again. Good luck

[Wondergirl]

Good for you, Susan! I live right down the road from McD's corporate office in Oak Brook, so let me know if you want me to do anything. Each restaurant should have a policy for dealing with customers like you've encountered and should have staff training procedures on how to handle them.