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Ladyladylady · Jul 4, 2011, 11:05 AM

A guy that I dated several years ago got married about 2 years ago. His wife died suddenly after a routine procedure about 2 months ago. I lost my sister a few years ago (although completely different) I can sympathize. At first it was the daily talk to check up on him and now we hang out and we've discussed dating again, but I'm afraid its too soon. How will we know when is a good time?

JudyKayTee · Jul 4, 2011, 11:09 AM

It's a good time when he's ready.

I was widowed. My husband was gone from me 1 minute after he died. He was also gone from me 1 year after he died.

I was the person who had to come to terms with his death, decide when it was time to move on, when I would be comfortable.

I will also add - losing a sister does not compare to losing a spouse.

I am very sorry about your sister, I truly am, but it is not the same as losing your life partner.

Obviously things have worked out between you but I was very unhappy when people I dated before my husband died contacted me AFTER he died to "hang out" or do whatever else they had in mind. I thought it was inappropriate. Please - I am not judging. I am telling you my personal experience on a public board.