[shake123]

I have been dating my boyfriend for two years, we both are in the same college, but we live in different states. He does nothing for me, Christmas of 2009 he went and got me a gift, but that is the ONLY thing, and I also bought him two sweaters. I buy him food, and also paid for him to get haircuts, and whenever I ask him for stuff, he gets all defensive, and says "I have no source of income, I dont even have money to fed myself"

I don't want to leave him, but I feel like all we do is have sex, and argue. He has dreams of becoming a pro-athlete, and I support him, but he WILL not work a regular job, and chase his dream, he acts like he is too good.

I'm tired of being the provider in all aspects, and getting nothing in return after two years. And he has NEVER brought me anything for my birthdays, Valentines days, and only one X-mas. What should I do?



Edited/T

[talaniman]

Get rid of a dead beat that doesn't make you happy.

[Shaaaye69]

Dump the man !

[briiibriii]

If he's a jerk to you he doesn't deserve you. Let him down easy, it might be hard but would you really want to spend time with a jerk and pay for everything for him? Noo. He's a screwup

[JoeCanada76]

Let me say, the very first problem I see is that you both live in different states. Wow, that can not be good anyway. Your expecting way too much in the relationship.

For him, maybe he is not that interested. Hard to keep a relationship going when your in two different states.

Time to end this relationship and maybe give yourself some time. Then hopefully you will find somebody closer to you that can give you the time and attention that your looking for.

[shake123]

I agree with the ones that said get rid of him but jesushelper76 if you're in love with someone and everything is going great you will make sacrifices with moving to a closer state or same state as your partner. As many times as I tried to break it off with him because he does nothing for me, he breaks down calling family trying to get them to convince me to stay with him.. my only problem is me giving him what he wants and me not getting anything I want... the different state thing is not that much of a big factor when we ALWAYS see each other

[JoeCanada76]

Actually yes it does have a big factor, whether you agree with my statements or not. This person is a child, this person is an attention seeker and your major part of the problem whether you realize it or not.

You're the one that is letting his behaviour continue.

[shake123]

You can't say things like YES IT DOES because nothing you say is a factor.. everyone is entitled to their own opinion.. but your right I'm letting his behavior continue by not breaking our relationship off if I'm not really happy... I just wanted to see how much people agreed with me

[Cat1864]

So, he chases after you when he isn't getting the attention he wants from you. You get back together with him when he hasn't changed or done anything to show he is attempting to change his behavior. That is one major red flag on the relationship. What happens if you don't get him things or want to have sex?

If he hasn't changed and expects you to be his 'meal ticket' until he someone hands him his dream, then perhaps you need to change your dream. Instead of supporting someone who seems to see you as a mom and adult toy, let him go. Let yourself heal and find someone who wants to be an equal in the relationship.

I might give different advice if he were trying to hold down at least a part time job, support his family or children, or several other understandably mitigating factors. However, he isn't.

Take care of yourself and let him mooch off someone else. Tell your relatives to ignore him or they can pay his way if they think he is such a good catch.

[shake123]

Cat1864.. thts the best I have heard.. thank you so much, I agree with you even though letting go is hard, I'm only 19 so I'm sure I can do better:)