[GotLove]

Why does my boyfriend prefer masturbating to having sex?

[Wondergirl]

I'll paraphrase what another member wrote not long ago --

"For most guys, we've been masturbating one to three times a day since fourth grade. It's like going to Chicago. A normal guy would much rather go to Chicago with his girlfriend rather than alone, but she isn't always around or interested, and Chicago is always there beckoning. It's a familiar place and we know the route by heart. And sometimes it's faster just to go to Chicago by yourself and not have to worry if the other person is having as much fun during the ride as you are."

[Cat1864]

Gotlove, it would help if you gave us more in formation such as:

How old are both of you?

How long have you been a couple?

Do you live together?

How do you know he prefers masturbating to sex? Have you asked him or are you going by your observations?

What are both of your expectations for the frequency of having sex? In other words, do you expect sex once a day and he is more along the lines of once a week? Do you see sex as the main way to show love and affection while he sees it as less important than other ways?

Does he have a lot of stress in his life?

Is he tired when you want to have sex?

Does he have any medical conditions or is he on any medications (including self medicating with alcohol or drugs)?

Plus any other information you think gives a clearer picture of the issue.

Simple answer is people masturbate because it is easier than worring about another person's needs and takes less effort. What the less simple answer is takes communicating and looking at all the factors in the relationship and environment to find.

[EricThePink]

Has he told you he prefers masturbating over sex or are you thinking because he has sex with you at times he should never masturbate? I have been masturbating on a regular basis since I found out about it as a teen and to this day still masturbate couple times a week. I am happily married and have been for quite sometime, Like masturbation, the sex has slowed a bit over the year and now it is only 3-4 times a week as opposed to the numerous times a day in years gone by but even while enjoying sex a great deal I still sometimes like to take things into my own hands, sometimes we masturbate together as well.
As others have mentioned, there are so many factors that play a role such as age, length of relationship etc... that it is a difficult question to answer, I would certainly tlk to him about it