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    no1mammy2be's Avatar
    no1mammy2be Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 22, 2011, 06:27 AM
    Father not wanting to be involved!
    I have recently found out am pregnant by my ex boyfriend of 2 years. He has told me he does want anything to do with the baby when it is born, for no reason at all. I have tried talking to him, to make him see that the action he is taking is not what is needed. He has already got a daughter that he went to court to get access too. What are the chances of him getting contact if he does not show to any appointments which he knows about and after all he has said? Also if he doesn't want contact how do I get him to pay maintence?
    this8384's Avatar
    this8384 Posts: 4,564, Reputation: 485
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    #2

    Jun 22, 2011, 06:36 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by no1mammy2be View Post
    I have recently found out am pregnant by my ex boyfriend of 2 years. He has told me he does want anything to do with the baby when it is born, for no reason at all. i have tried talking to him, to make him see that the action he is taking is not what is needed. he has already got a daughter that he went to court to get access too. What are the chances of him getting contact if he does not show to any appointments which he knows about and after all he has said? also if he doesnt want contact how do i get him to pay maintence?
    You file for child support after the baby is born.

    The court will probably grant him visitation rights to the child - while you can't force him to participate in the child's life, you also cannot interfere if he has a change of heart and the court has granted him rights to see the child.
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
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    #3

    Jun 22, 2011, 06:53 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by this8384 View Post
    You file for child support after the baby is born.

    The court will probably grant him visitation rights to the child ...
    I don't know that the court will, solely upon an action to establish child support. Many states have agencies to administratively establish and collect child support, and if you use one of them, they aren't going to get into visitation issues.

    What state (or country, if not in the U.S.) are you in?
    no1mammy2be's Avatar
    no1mammy2be Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Jun 22, 2011, 07:27 AM
    Comment on AK lawyer's post
    United kingdom
    no1mammy2be's Avatar
    no1mammy2be Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jun 22, 2011, 07:27 AM
    Comment on this8384's post
    I would never stop him getting involved if he wanted to, I just wanted to see what would happen... so if he doesn't want to be involved he will still have to pay child mainteance?
    this8384's Avatar
    this8384 Posts: 4,564, Reputation: 485
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    #6

    Jun 22, 2011, 07:35 AM

    He is only required to pay if you file in court. Morally, he should pay regardless but you have no legal way of requiring him to pay unless there is a court order.
    AK lawyer's Avatar
    AK lawyer Posts: 12,592, Reputation: 977
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    #7

    Jun 22, 2011, 09:42 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by no1mammy2be View Post
    ... so if he doesnt want to be involved he will still have to pay child mainteance?
    Certainly.

    But, as goes the old saying, "you can lead a horse to water but you cannot make it drink," you cannot force him to be involved (other than to pay court-ordered child maintenance) with his child.
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