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    codyshawn's Avatar
    codyshawn Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 8, 2011, 05:57 PM
    Why does my son allow his father to always give excuses for not visiting?
    My ex-husband always has excuses for not visiting our 11 year old son. Our son will be upset & hurt until his dad calls with a very unbelievable excuse. This has been going on since we divorced 3 years ago.When his dad finally does see him, our son talks like his dad walks on water till we go through it again.Many times the dad turns the table to make it out to be our sons fault. Our son was in counseling when we first divorced, but through a fit about going once his dad starting telling him the councelor is a crazy doctor & sissy's talk about their feelings. I hate seeing my son hurt & being on this rollercoaster ride. Please help with how to help my son deal with his dad.
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #2

    Jun 8, 2011, 06:00 PM

    Your son is a child, and he loves his father. He allows these excuses because admitting that his dad is not a good person would hurt too much. He wants his dad in his life, and if that means accepting the things his dad does, he'll accept them.

    He needs to be in counseling. You're one of his parents. Does he live with you? Are you the main caregiver? If so, you have to make sure that your son gets the help he needs.

    One day his dads excuses won't be enough. One day he'll actually believe that this is his fault. He may already believe that. He'll need help dealing with that. More help than you can give.

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