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clair1234 · Apr 30, 2011, 05:05 PM

I am really desperate for any advice. My boyfriend of little over a year won't kiss me or have sex with me. We have only had sex 3 times and that was about 8 months ago. In the beginning he was always trying to make out with me and kiss me and now I have to ask for a kiss. He is 35 and I am 26. He is about 268lbs and I'm am about 130lbs. He is really nice but never shows any emotions. I know that most guys would want me but not him. Im to scared to make any moves because of rejection. He won't kiss me nor hold me or makeout or touch me. Im not sure what I am doing wrong. His family loves me.
He has to use viagra and he is on the small side. I think he feels bad because of his weight and he thinks he is to heavy for me he has a belly but I like it. Please any advice would help.

Wondergirl · Apr 30, 2011, 05:10 PM

I also am guessing it is insecurity on his part.

Has he ever thought about changing his life and losing weight, for his health's sake, if for no other reason?

How is he socially in general? Does he avoid making eye contact? Does he freak out in crowded and/or noisy places?

clair1234 · Apr 30, 2011, 05:30 PM

He actually works with customers everyday. He used to be real lazy by not even going into work and letting his employees do all the work. He is or was addicted to video games and his me time is very important to him. We normally would just hang out Saturday night and Sunday because of his me time.

Cat1864 · May 1, 2011, 05:28 AM

If he is using Viagra, has he been diagnosed with any health issues such as Diabetes or Depression? The weight could be a symptom of a greater problem that is affecting his libido and showing affection.

Have you sat down and talked to him about what is going on? If so, what does he say? If not, you need to be honest with him about your concerns and listen to what he says. Together you either need to find a fix/compromise or decide that this relationship is not working out before it causes issues that can't be fixed.

clair1234 · May 1, 2011, 01:15 PM

@ Cat1864 - I don't know if he was ever diagnosed with depression but I do know that he is depressed most of the time all though he doesn't show it. I have tried to talk to him about it but he laughs at me and he'll get angry with me if I try to mention anything and normally ignores me for a day or two. He doesn't really like to resolve an issue he would rather hope it goes away on its own. He always says we have to see what happens. He also said that he will try on his part. But that was about 4 months ago. Im lucky if I get a peck kiss on my lips from him. I've asked him what I can do to change or do to make him want me but he says I'm fine just the way I am. He has not said he loves me at all either. Im guessing Im fighting a losing battle