[ivanilyich]

He's never been THAT outgoing but progressively through his 4 years of high school he's gotten worse. He's 17 now and the situation has gotten really bad. He never goes out, does nothing, never talks to anyone, doesn't seem to have any friends. He even used to have a beautiful and caring girlfriend but I don't know what happened to her. All he does is sit at his little desk on the computer, watch cartoons/anime, draws stuff/doodles, and reads. I mean he's a brilliant student (he's already been accepted into an ivy league) but I want him to enjoy his senior year, go out with girls, socialize a bit - not sit at home and watch anime. I mean even when I ask him to come out with me and my friends to hang, he always just flat out refuses and gives a lame excuse. What's up with him?

[cdad]

One thing you didn't mention is his asperations. What is he expecting from life? It could be that he just doesn't adhere to the whole peer pressure thing of his peers and this is his way of getting through it. If he likes anime then see if there is a convention near you and go with him to it. If he's wanting to get into graphic arts then look for activities involving that. Maybe he is feeling the push of the final year and knowing that its all over soon and he's disconnecting early.

[ivanilyich]

He's always sitting at his computer alone, watching, playing, or reading something. He's a brilliant student who will be going to an ivy league next year and our parents have high expectations for him. However, I don't think he's into any of that educational stuff at all despite his work ethic and grades. He doesn't really have any friends, never had a girlfriend, he sits at home all day. He's 17 but he's still really into anime, cartoons, disney and all that stuff. He draws a lot, he's into lucid dreaming ,he's not social at all, and is quiet all the time. What's wrong with him? Should I be worried? He's always kind of been like this but as he got older it got progressively worse. It's like he's not going up and his head is in some cartoon world of his.

[LeonaDy]

Everybody is different. I don't believe something is wrong with him from what you described. It seems to me you are a very social and extraverted person, so you have difficulty imagining how someone can be comfortable being alone most of the time. There are extremes to everything. I know someone who hates (HATES!) solitude and cannot grasp the idea of someone wanting some peace. Would you say something is wrong with him? Probably not because being extraverted is what's socially desirable and accepted. But being marginal isn't the end of the world.

If it can make you feel better though, there is this other guy I know who was just like your brother. It was my friends brother.. well, more accurately, that human presence in front of his computer behind a closed door down the hall. He is 21 now and I can actually describe what he looks like (which I couldn't before because he was behind a closed door down the hall). It's like he gained in maturity over time and realized he was cutting himself off from the world. So give your brother time, being socially active is part of the human nature. It will come. BUT, you have to respect his desire for solitude. Don't push him and tell him "Go out! See people!". It will just frustrate him.

[mmresd]

People differ. For example, my older brother has always been calm, gotten good grades and be into his computer till the age of 27! Had girlfriends, but never paid much attention to them. But, now he is a social butterfly and goes out about 4-5 times a week.

I lost my virginity at the age of twelve, partied in all of middle school, high school, and still partying in college.

My little brother, is very shy, low number of friends, calm, and never really shows enthusiasm for anything unless I cheer him up first. He keeps to himself like my older other, which differs a lot from me because if I'm not surrounded by people I feel depressed.

So let him be, and he will have a good time in his own way. Don't worry about him so much and let him mentally develop at his own pace, after all, he is doing good on all the important things in life.

Good luck,
Javi