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madly_in_ove · Feb 26, 2011, 06:36 AM

Me and my boyfriend recently got back together and he has been asking me if I will have sex with him, I don't know if I'm ready for it as it will also be my first time, I think I am more scared about doing than not wanting to. He has told me he won't force me into anything I don't want to do, but I feel like I'm letting him down if I don't have sex with him.What should I do?x

adam_89 · Feb 26, 2011, 06:40 AM

I think you shouldn't have sex with him. I don't think you want to or you wouldn't be asking for advice here. You just want someone to tell you if you should or shouldn't and we can't make your decisions. You know inside what you really want to do, but please wait until you are older and are truly in love and when YOU feel it is the right time. If he says he won't push you then don't let him and don't do it.

J_9 · Feb 26, 2011, 06:43 AM

Let me ask you this...

Are you ready to be pregnant?

Sex=babies. There is no form of birth control that is 100% effective. Many girls get pregnant their first time.

So, are you ready to be a mother? Can you afford to raise a baby on your own?

madly_in_ove · Feb 26, 2011, 06:49 AM

Thank you this has helped, but we always do the same now kiss, cuddle, make out, I don't want him to get bored with me, I really do love him of course I do, but I don't want to let him down, so times I feel I'm up for it, but then I think of how I might feel after and whether I will regret it or not, I don't know whether to talk to him about this or whether that will make him think I'm ready, I'm just very confused at the minute,

J_9 · Feb 26, 2011, 07:01 AM

tgelinas does not find this helpful : It uses scare tactics and generalized statistics.

I was not using scare tactics or generalized statistics. I am a labor and delivery nurse. I deliver babies to young teens quite frequently. At least 3 or for a week.

I also was on two forms of birth control (the pill AND a condom) and I got pregnant twice. Oh, yeah, and I had cancer and went through chemotherapy. Doctor told me chemo would make me sterile. Lo and behold, 5 years later I was pregnant again.

Please be careful when you try to ruin someone's reputation by giving them a reddie when they give you FACTUAL information.

madly_in_ove · Feb 26, 2011, 07:06 AM

Okaay thank you, I guess I need to take on the risks and that, thanks you've been a great help :)

Fr_Chuck · Feb 26, 2011, 07:15 AM

A relationship needs to be based on doing things together not sexual, while the snuggle and making out is OK, if that is all you are doing, you need to do other things.

adam_89 · Feb 26, 2011, 07:31 AM

Just try and keep it PG so there isn't any regrets.

ScottGem · Feb 26, 2011, 07:43 AM

How old are you? There are three issues here

1) if you are underage, he may be risking a statutory rape charge.
2) You stand the risk of pregnancy. No one should engage in sexual intercourse unless they are physically, emotionally and financially prepared to have a child.
3) Are you truly in a long term committed relationship?

Sex is not recreation. Sex is something you share with someone you are deeply and truly committed to. You have broken up with him once. Maybe he got back together with you because he felt you would feel obligated to have sex with him. Sure he says he won't force you, but he is obviously doing so because you feel you you would be "letting him down".

adviceishere · Feb 26, 2011, 08:29 AM

Don't worry your rep isn't ruined! I love your all advice!
Ps. You are one fertile lady! LOL that's amazing and scary at the same time :O

Sweetkiss02 · Feb 26, 2011, 11:47 PM

If you don't feel like having sex emotionally than you shouldn't. If you don't feel ready, than your not ready. And if you feel like saying no to him would be letting him down, that's like feeling guilt. Which nobody should ever do anything against their own guilt; that just means that it wasn't your true decision and that you felt you NEEDED to do it not that you wanted to. Also, no teen should really have sex because most of them lead to teen pregnancy's and most aren't ready for a baby. And unless you have tons off money, are ready to take care of a baby on your own (because you can not depend on any man in this case), can double task with school and raising the kid, and for telling your parents that you are pregnant. Than yes maybe having sex is an option, but only if YOU want to do it! Follow your heart not anybody else's. To shorten it in case your still confused: If your heads filled with confusion on what to do than don't have sex. Wait until your older with a stabler life and partner. So what if you do the same things? If he truly loves you and you truly love him than you both can wait. I really hope I helped :)

sammieeroxiee · Feb 27, 2011, 10:05 AM

I knoe you love him but I don't think you shood have sex with him cuzz if you do u won't be able to go to school and get the education you need to take care of a baby. I garentee you will endup with a GED. I'm not saying tha a baby will ruine your life I'm saying you shood wait till you are old enough and actually have the money and the time to be an adult. Live your life but don't live it too fast. Hope I helped you out
<3 sammie