[drummergirl489]

Me and my best friend( guy) both are in a relationship, we helped each other through everything and got along really well and could talk to each other about anything. His girlfriend decided that we had been spending too much time together and she told my boyfriend that we were cheating on them. The resolution was that me and my best friend are no longer allowed to talk to each other. Things were good for a while, but I'm starting to miss him. Me and my boyfriend are having major issues and he's the only person I want to talk to. His girlfriend likes me now and I don't think she would mind if we were friends, but my boyfriend will just be done with me if he finds out I have been talking to him. Should I talk to him anyway? I really miss my best friend and having that one person who completely understood me and could always help me with everything.

[talaniman]

You can't make everyone happy, and you can't be caught in the middle of this crap either. Seems you both are in relationships with partners that don't understand your friendship, and feel threatened by it, so make a choice, back off each other, or dump your partners. Have you ever talked about this with your friend? What dos he say?

[drummergirl489]

Well talking to him is not really an option. He has said things behind my back about how angry he is at me for choosing my boyfriend over him. But he also posts things on his blog about how much he misses our friendship. I think he is in denial. But I will never know unless I talk to him. But unless I can somehow get him away from his girlfriend I will never know. She reads all of his texts and everything so its not that easy to contact him. But I'm thinking of breaking up with my boyfriend anyway, I just don't know if I should go back to my best friend. Or let him be so that I don't jeprodize his relationship.

[ken007nielsen]

Well, first off dump your boyfriend, reason being that your already thhinking about it, no reason to be in it then.

About his relationship, his girlfriend sounds a lot like a total control freak, and he is blogging that he misses you, which I assume she reads - so it's public knowledge. So obviously he is missing you, and the girlfriend proberly knows about it. And I'm pretty sure he's going to get real tired of his girlfriend really soon if she needs to know everything about what he does.

About the talking about your back, I sometimes say things I don't really mean because I'm mad. Perhaps this is the reasons. Though you can't know for sure until you ask him.

Normally you should butt out of a relationship, if it's a healty relationship with some other problems.
But I wouldent forsake my friend because his girlfriend said so - so if your both willing to make amends and get back to the good old days, I say go for it.

[talaniman]

You better leave him and his girlfriend, and their relationship alone. Sure you miss the friendship, but he has to make his own choices, just as you do. It has to be without the influence of one another.