[criticallly]

Threads merged, please keep all questions regarding the same issue in the same thread


I have a problem that I like a guy in my class and I know that he don't like me back and he don't want to be my best friend he always chit chatting with some of the other girls of the class he don't give much attention to me I have tried every possible thing to be with him and if I tell him that I love u then I might lose friendship too that's why I'm afraid of telling him I have many friends in my class who are males I'm not ignoring anyone... I fall in love with him when our college life started last year and now its been 4 months I thought he loves me because at that time he is always staring at me and the first female friend was me of him he was also my school mate but we never met at school he is always gossiping with me and with other girls very few chit chat who are now his best friends this is because I fall for him though I love someone else before but not now as I love my class fellow/good friend... one new girl came to our class and she break the friendship with other girls of the class and from him she is now his most best friend she advised her to change his style and he did but one thing is left which I can do that is to quit his smoking I can advice him for it and I know he will feel good if someone loves him but till now he don't know I love him but at the same time he don't want to be in relation ship now we both are of same age should I tell him before it gets too late may be I have to leave this college after completing one year so I'm tensed any guide about this? Can you suggest any signs to give him back so hr=e can guess in the last previous days he thought that a girl in our class who is his nest friends likes him but it was wrong when he proposed her she got angry so its obvious no one likes him from my friends... please answer as soon as possible I know I have asked a little bit of this but now as a whole I want answer

[joypulv]

This isn't a problem, sorry.
You can't make people like you or love you.
Just about everyone in the world goes through something like this at one time or another, but most people have sense enough to give up and concentrate on other people and interests!
Try to think of someone you brushed off - a little brother or sister, a cat or dog, a less popular girl in school, a shy unattractive guy. How did you act? You may have ignored them or even been mean without realizing it.

He just plain isn't interested, and it has nothing to do with how attractive or interesting you are. People click with some people and not others.

[criticallly]

This is my reply to your answer... umm no I have many friends in my class who are males I'm not ignoring anyone... I fall in love with him when our college life started last year and now its been 4 months I thought he loves me because at that time he is always staring at me and the first female friend was me of him he was also my school mate but we never met at school he is always gossiping with me and with other girls very few chit chat who are now his best friends this is because I fall for him though I love someone else before but not now as I love my class fellow/good friend... one new girl came to our class and she break the friendship with other girls of the class and from him she is now his most best friend she advised her to change his style and he did but one thing is left which I can do that is quit smoking I can advice him for quitting smoking and I know he will feel good if someone loves him but till now he don't know I love him should I tell? Before it gerts too late may be I have to leave this college after completing one year so I'm tensed any guide about this?

[talaniman]

You are too carried away by your own wants, and needs that you have ignored the proof of his actions, by only thinking with your heart, and not your head.

You need to leave the fellow alone, and let him do his own thing without you.

Let this go, you are leaving this college any way, so let this crush pass. Doesn't matter if its love, or lust, or just friendship, but you are consumed by him in a very unhealthy way, but don't let it distract you from what you should be doing, getting an education.

[criticallly]

How can I let it go this way? In think I seriously can't live without him... im so disturbed these days, what if I tell him that I love him should I tell or not? I don't to lose his friendship and I want to be his best friend any guide about this?

[talaniman]

It takes time to let this go, and it takes time to get your feelings under control. Give yourself some time before you ruin things by making a fool over yourself.

[answerme_tender]

Well I am going to approach this from a different perspective. If this guy is friends with ALL the girls in class and is in the middle of all the girl gossip about the other students, have you ever stopped to thing he wouldn't EVER be interested in you due to the fact you are a woman. You advised that a new young lady started your class and now they are best friends. That they basically have talked about his style and he is nowing trying a new style meaning fashion, but hey he just didn't apparently like her enough to quit smoking.

Now this is just a different thought on your situation. Bottom line is just like the other advisors you need to move on because no MATTER he is NEVER going to be interested in you that WAY!! Next time don't fall head over heels in love with someone untll they at least give you actual encouragement!!

Take care

[criticallly]

OK I will try my best to move on but if I can't get him I want to be his best friend, how can I be his nbest friend? Thanks all for advising me...