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senti71 · Jan 31, 2011, 08:01 AM

Recently me and my husband were at a party with our friends where we played a game for couples. There was a question about who was your first crush. Everybody else (the husbands) didn't write anything except for my husband who wrote "classmate" as the answer. This became the hot topic for the party and everyone looked at me for my reaction. I took it in a good spirit and joked it off, but inside I was hurt that my husband was so insensitive , he should have not disclosed this in front of all my friends and made me feel humiliated.Other husbands always express their love for their wife and here is my husband who is disclosing something which should be only between the two of us. My question is , am I wrong in feeling bad about this? Am I being too sentimental?

Jewel_33 · Jan 31, 2011, 08:10 AM

You're being too sentimental about it. You knew that the game had the potential to reveal things that you may or may not have been ready to hear. You have to understand and accept the fact that he had a life before you. You can't expect him to delete all of his past memories. He was just playing the game. I highly doubt his intentions were to "kill you from within" by writing "classmate." If he wrote something like "Big Booty, easy going Judy" then yeah wonder what his intentions were. Take it all in stride and keep going. You have a past just as he does. He married you, not "the classmate," so what's the big deal? Leave it in the past and move on.

joypulv · Jan 31, 2011, 08:22 AM

Humiliated? Please! Humiliated is when you walk in on him in bed with said classmate. He is being innocently open and honest about Life Before Wife, while the other husbands are concealing what they are thinking. Your marriage (if you let it) should last a lot longer than theirs. Give him a big smooch and tell him you love him even more.

senti71 · Jan 31, 2011, 09:44 AM

Thanks, your answer made me feel better, my only concern was him revealing the fact in front of all, and not the crush. However , I appreciate his straightforwardness!

senti71 · Jan 31, 2011, 09:51 AM

Thanks, I know I am being too sentimental, its like something that I could not handle myself, I felt less loved! Thanks for the reply!

J_9 · Jan 31, 2011, 09:54 AM

You are being wayyyyy too sensitive! Heck, my first crush was in 2nd grade for heaven's sake! This could be the same with your husband.

If you are this sensitive, it may be best not to play these "games" that can open up cans of worms.

answerme_tender · Jan 31, 2011, 10:25 AM

My question is would you of answered the question honestly?

We all have fond memories of our crushes. No one, husband/wife should ever make us feel about guilty for remembering them or even talking about them!!

Be proud that at least your husband had enough confidence in his wife to feel that he could answer the question honestly. I only hope he didn't notice that confidence was perhaps not returned in full by his wife!!

I am not trying to be harsh, but you are a grown woman who is married, if you don't want to participate in a game that is designated to ask questions to adult couples why even play?? Then you feel jealousy over your husband for being HONEST and talking about a crush. You did your husband an injustice. You blamed him for your jealousy!!

Remember bottom line is that your husband loves you enough that he CHOSE YOU!! That choice should be honored with some back up when he should talk about a first crush!

Take care