Check out some similar questions!

mossme89 · Jan 14, 2011, 11:57 AM

This is long, but ANY feedback would be VERY appreciated!!

I'm probably just infatuated with this girl at my HS. But regardless, I just want to treat her well and care for her. I heard a rumor she's had a rough history with guys just trying to get into her pants and has no respect for them (she's drop dead gorgeous). But though I'm very attracted to her, I really would just want to treat her well and do nice things for her. I know her from a sport last year, I spent time around her during lunch, and it was really nice. Then, I said the wrong thing (told her she shouldn't put up with her boyfriend telling her what to do). Things went downhill and she thought I was creepy and a stalker, when I wouldn't give her space (my mistake). When I realized my mistake, I gave her space, from January-April, when I decided to do something nice and leave her an anonymous compliment online. Bad move. After some chatting, she figured out it was me and she thought I was even more of a creeper/stalker. In September, I apologized to her and we made up. But then I screwed up again and made a bad joke. I said "Stalking me again ____?". So I've been giving her space since then again, totally ignoring her.

I was planning on talking to her again, but didn't have a chance to today.
So today, I walked past her, within 10 feet or so, to talk to friends after school. About 5 minutes later, I walked back towards the library to talk to other friends. She was about 30 feet away to the right (I was walking in a different direction, straight), but she looked at me (I saw out of the corner of my eye), tugged a friends shoulder, and walked away. I have a feeling it was because I was coming closer. When I got home, I just broke down in tears. You have no idea how much that hurt. My social awkwardness keeps getting in the way, and it's just painful… Any advice? I want to do something to sort things out. I sent her a message to make up at the beginning of the year, then again after the bad joke (she replied with one letter, k as in OK, which was a lot less than before). Should I send her another Facebook message? And what should I say? Or should I talk to her in person? I haven't said a word to her, since September.

Let me just say, she's pretty much the girl of my dreams and I really want to get her back, even as a friend.

I wish · Jan 14, 2011, 12:05 PM

Harshness warning

As harsh is this may sound, you've become obsessed with her and you're not in the best position to communicate with her. It's like the case of falling over every time you glance at her.

I suggest you work on your own confidence and self-esteem first before worrying about communicating with her. There's always going to be things that you say or do that you wish that you can take back. It's part of growing up and especially being a teenager. I suggest you continue to interact with others to help develop your social skills. Once you've gained more confidence and self-esteem, then it would be easier on you to talk to her.

Furthermore, I would stop using the electronic world to communicate with her. It's like you're hiding behind your computer to talk to her. If you really wanted to talk to her, do it in person. But before you talk to her in person again, I strongly suggest you develop your social skills.

88sunflower · Jan 14, 2011, 12:08 PM

I want to say apologize to her but at the same time it seems you have made her uncomfortable. Leaving her to her space was a smart idea. She may be the girl of your dreams but that doesn't mean you're the boy of her dreams. Just keep it casual. Don't go after her. With any luck she will come to you if she is interested in friendship.

mossme89 · Jan 14, 2011, 12:55 PM

Yes, it's like I go up to her and am sort of frozen because I'm mesmerized, sort of.

What's strange is that, I don't have issues with other girls I like, just her. But I like her more than all the other girls combined.

mossme89 · Jan 14, 2011, 12:56 PM

What about maybe starting a conversation with her, next time I see her? Just casual, like you said.

88sunflower · Jan 14, 2011, 06:57 PM

I say no leave her alone. Can't you see that she backs away when your around? So it sounds. Give her the space she seems to want from you. In more up front words, get over it. You can't make her like you if she doesn't want to like you.

messinger · Jan 15, 2011, 04:00 PM

I can think of one thing as sunflower said leave her alone it doesn't have to be forever just for awile so you can sort out your thoughts for her and give er a break so get it straight what your going to do then go talk to her about it or just ask her friends what she thinks about you and if they think she wilL give you another chance at friedship. Hope all goes well ;)