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nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 02:40 PM

I have been with my partner for 4years he has a son who is 5years old. The mother of the child is asking for child support which my partner does not mind paying, Im just wondering can the mother make me pay child support too? I live in New Zealand if that helps.

JudyKayTee · Jan 10, 2011, 02:47 PM

A step parent is a person who is married to one of the natural parents. I don't see that here.

No, you cannot be forced to pay child support for a child who is not yours in any Country.

The only exception is States and Countries where HOUSEHOLD INCOME is considered, not just the income of the parent.

I do notice that New Zealand asks specifically if the parent has a PARTNER, not a spouse. You would have to fill out the calculator to see what info is being requested. That will tell you if it's household or parental income. Child support liability calculator (by tool name)

Fr_Chuck · Jan 10, 2011, 02:49 PM

First you are not a step parent, you are a live in boyfriend of a women who has a child.

nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 03:44 PM

What if my partner and I are in a de-facto relationship?

nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 03:51 PM

I don't understand? I get that I'm not a step parent but can she take my money if my partner and I are in a de-facto relationship? ( because people have been telling me this that if a am I a de-facto reationship she can take my money).

nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 03:55 PM

I was just wondering, my partner and I have been together for 4years now we share everything a home and pay for bill equally. I wanted to know if we ever broke up how would we split everything?? What could I do to prevent him from taking everything and leaving me with nothing?

ScottGem · Jan 10, 2011, 04:02 PM

First, may I call your attention to the guidelines for using the comments feature found here:

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/feedba...ure-24951.html

If you don't understand a response then ask for clarification don't give a negative rating.

Unless NZ law recognizes a "de-facto relationship" as a legal entity, then you are off the hook.

nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 04:03 PM

I was just wondering, my partner and I have been together for 4years now we share everything a home and pay for bill equally. I wanted to know if we ever broke up how would we split everything?? What could I do to prevent him from taking everything and leaving me with nothing?
I live in New Zealand by the way.

nazarene · Jan 10, 2011, 04:05 PM

I am so sorry I didn't know that the rating effected anybody..

ScottGem · Jan 10, 2011, 04:13 PM

And please don't use the Comments feature for followups.

Are you in a de facto relationship? Parry Field Lawyers, Christchurch, New Zealand

joypulv · Jan 10, 2011, 04:32 PM

'A domestic partnership is a legal or personal relationship between two individuals who live together and share a common domestic life but are neither joined by marriage nor a civil union. However, in some jurisdictions, such as Australia, New Zealand, the United States of Oregon, Washington, Nevada, and California, a domestic partnership is almost equivalent to marriage, or to other legally recognized same-sex or different-sex unions. The terminology for such unions is still evolving, and the exact level of rights and responsibilities conferred by a domestic partnership varies widely from place to place.'

That's from wikipedia.
I would draw up a document between you specifying what you own together and how you have paid for or are still paying for it. Have it notarized together, and keep a good paper trail. You could also have an agreement between you two, and have that notarized too.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 10, 2011, 05:02 PM

There are only a few places in the US that accept common law marriage, and most will require more than 4 years

So if there is a home, you must be on the deed, whoever is on the deed is the owner, you need to have a written contract as to the division of property, esp if jointly owned.
It is a lot easier to write up an agreement when you are still in love, than when things get bad.

And I am sorry, I did delete one answer since they were wrong saying that common law exists in all of the US.

talaniman · Jan 10, 2011, 10:22 PM

Get married. Put your name on everything, LEGALLY!!

nazarene · Jan 12, 2011, 01:45 PM

Im am asking on behalf of my brother, well here goes.
My brother and ex girlfriend had a child who is 3years old now, the ex girlfriend (lets call her jazz) Well she recently applied for child support (she is on a benefit atm) my brother and her had an agreement where he would pay x amount of money to his child's account as asked by jazz. The child lives with jazz mon-fri and he picks up the child fri-sun he has asked her if he could have the child longr but she won't let him and she doesn't give a reason? I know what uz are going to say "Go to court right?" my brother wants to know if there is a easier way to go about this? They have split up by the way.

I guess what he wants to know is can she apply for child support behind his back and can she refuse him time with their child? Also who has custody of the child, They haven't been to court for this? Wel live in New Zealand *** HELP MY BROTHER IS DISTRESSD

martinizing2 · Jan 12, 2011, 02:02 PM

I have been through a custody battle myself
And have been witness to several more.

The ONLY thing to do is get a lawyer now.
Not tomorrow now, and get to court.

The only way you will have access to your child
That is any semblance to fair is through the court.

It is sad, unfair, and stressful but...
That's the way it is.

nazarene · Jan 12, 2011, 03:35 PM

My brother pays child support which he doesn't mind as he understands NOW its his responsibility. His ex has been telling his NOW partner that she can also make her pay for their child. My brothers partner earns more than him, don't get me wrong his now partner loves and adores the child she just doesn't see why the mother of the child wants the her money?? Ive been told by people that if my brother includes his partner in his living allowance that his chils support will be reduced... Is this true even thou his partner earns more? Wouldn't they both have to pay more if they combine their income? We live in New Zealand *** need advice my brothers partner is going insane with all this baby mama drama, She really doesn't deserve this he is a wonderful step parent and person.

ScottGem · Jan 12, 2011, 04:31 PM

First, please stop opening new threads over the same issue. I've merged all your threads into one.

Also please get your story straight as you have now been telling it in different ways.

Use the Answer options to add to THIS thread.

talaniman · Jan 12, 2011, 04:58 PM

This is not about some emotional argument about who's nice, and who'd not, and who deserves what. Its about responsibility, and obligations. The court sets the rules about child support, and custody, and your brother should handle his business as a man, and present his side in court, so both side can abide by the rules the court lays down, or be in contempt.

She is handling her business correctly, so should he.

Child support by country - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Child support

JudyKayTee · Jan 12, 2011, 06:15 PM

Why don't you come back and post a cohesive story with all the details 100% correct and give us a chance to answer you - ?

nazarene · Jan 13, 2011, 12:14 PM

I did except some one thread all my questions together which is just confusing me with the answers...