Check out some similar questions!

bigbang5 · Jan 9, 2011, 02:55 PM

There is one guy whom I like.. but he is hiv positive... he likes me too... should I date him?

tickle · Jan 9, 2011, 03:15 PM

The gentleman you are planning on dating probably has AIDS an incurable condition, bigbang, unless you have been reading newspapers, articles, magazines, this is not a situation you should involve yourself with. I give him credit for telling you first, but he is probably on an international database already.

Tick

Alty · Jan 9, 2011, 03:35 PM

I don't think dating him is an issue, but sex is. The question you have to ask yourself, depending on your age, is if you want to be in a relationship where sex really isn't an option.

Dating him won't put you at risk. If the relationship goes further than just dating (which most relationships eventually do) than you would be at risk. It's a tough decision, and only one you can really make.

Fr_Chuck · Jan 9, 2011, 04:25 PM

There are a lot of great wonderful men and women who are HIV positive, But there is no cure at this point, but treatments are helping prolong the illness.

Of course any sex, even protected will put you at risk, so if you can live with that, many do have relationships

Mikeg021 · May 15, 2012, 11:13 PM

Hi Bigbang5...
I am HIV+ and have a partner who is HIV-
We have a very healthy sexual relationship, you just need to make sure that you use protection every time you have sexual intercourse.
You need to be completely open and totally honest with each other, my partner and I even go to Doctor appointments together sometimes to ensure that we are both fully up to date with each others situations!
HIV is NOT the death sentence it used to be and there are some very successful medications out there these days... I have been on medication from 3 months after I was diagnosed positive (nearly 3 years)... As I manage my HIV and continue to take my medication correctly I have maintained and undetectable viral load which is even more of a safety measure against my partner contracting the disease.

You need to make sure that you ask this guy all the questions you can think of... He has already given you the gift of being honest with you, the least you can do is give him the opportunity to explain his situation. I wish I was given this opportunity!

Alty · May 16, 2012, 03:30 PM

Originally Posted by Mikeg021

Hi Bigbang5...
I am HIV+ and have a partner who is HIV-
We have a very healthy sexual relationship, you just need to make sure that you use protection every time you have sexual intercourse.
You need to be completely open and totally honest with each other, my partner and I even go to Doctor appointments together sometimes to ensure that we are both fully up to date with each others situations!!
HIV is NOT the death sentence it used to be and there are some very successful medications out there these days... I have been on medication from 3 months after I was diagnosed positive (nearly 3 years) ... As I manage my HIV and continue to take my medication correctly I have maintained and undetectable viral load which is even more of a safety measure against my partner contracting the disease.

You need to make sure that you ask this guy all the questions you can think of... He has already given you the gift of being honest with you, the least you can do is give him the opportunity to explain his situation. I wish I was given this opportunity!

Although I do agree with you, I just want to point something out. The OP in this thread sounds very young. Most likely a very young teen, or young adult. Sadly, sex education isn't what it should be, and most young people nowadays have unprotected sex without a second thought of the consequences.

We all need to keep that in mind when we answer questions here. Telling someone to use protection, it doesn't work. We've been there on this site, and, the only real form of protection against HIV is a condom, which is also the least reliable valid form of birth control on the market. There's a reason for this. Most people don't use condoms correctly.

While I do agree there are ways to protect yourself, one last thing I have to point out is that you and your partner both have HIV. Even though there is still a risk for the two of you, there's not as high a risk as there would be for the OP. She is HIV free, but the man she just met, and isn't in a serious relationship with, has HIV.

The only real way to be 100% safe is to avoid having sex. If she were to date this man, and develop feelings for him, and then want to spend her life with him, my advice would be different then what I posted, because sex with an infected partner can be done, just not easily. But for someone she just met, I stick by my original advice, that sex should be avoided.

I hope you can understand my take on this.

Mikeg021 · May 17, 2012, 12:54 AM

I'm sorry Alty, but you are so wrong it's not funny! My partner is NOT HIV+ and tests show that. I also have close friends who are in a sero-discordant relationship and have been for 15 years, 1 negative and 1 positive and they have a very active sexual relationship; using protection!

Alty · May 17, 2012, 03:15 PM

Originally Posted by Mikeg021

I'm sorry Alty, but you are so wrong it's not funny! My partner is NOT HIV+ and tests show that. I also have close friends who are in a sero-discordant relationship and have been for 15 years, 1 negative and 1 positive and they have a very active sexual relationship; using protection!

I apologize. When I read your post I didn't see the + sign and - sign. I only read that you both had HIV. My mistake.

Having said that, I still stand by the rest of my post. It's obvious that you and your partner are in a serious long term relationship. The OP isn't. I don't think that the fact that he's HIV should deter her from dating him, but she does have to think long and hard about what she wants in a relationship, what she's willing to risk.

Condoms break all the time. One oops, and your life could be on the line. That's a bit much to risk on a guy you're only considering dating.

CURIOUSLITTLE1 · Sep 23, 2012, 08:10 PM

That's probobly the sweetest / weirdest / kindest / scariest/ romantic thing I've ever seen someone type lol. Forreal that's sweet nowadays there are so many ways around your partner passiing it on to you... and I think it is awsome that there are still people like you out there. EVERYONE NEEDS LOVE. Never been in this situation but you can't help who you love my love.

Alty · Sep 23, 2012, 09:42 PM

Originally Posted by CURIOUSLITTLE1

thats probobly the sweetest / weirdest / kindest / scariest/ romantic thing iv ever seen someone type lol. forreal thats sweet nowadays there are so many ways around your partner passiing it on to you...and i think it is awsome that there are still people like you out there. EVERYONE NEEDS LOVE. never been in this situation but you can't help who you love my love.

Not only is this an old thread, started in 2011, the poster never came back. I'd also like to know where you see that she stated she's in love. I'm not seeing anything saying she's in love, only that she's considering dating this guy. Also, no where did she say she was having sex with him.

She simply stated that she's thinking of dating him. That's it. No love, no sex, nothing other than a date.