[britmg]

I'm 16. I'm straight, and in no way am I a pedophile, I know with complete assurance I would never harm a child. I would never do anything so morally wrong, in which the future of a child would be in complete pieces and its mental and physical health would be overwhelmingly damaged. I would never hurt a child because naturally I am completely repulsed by the idea before it's fully gathered in my mind. But I have an awful problem.

I keep thinking one recurring thought, just out of the blue. Three years ago, I couldn't sleep at the sound of my baby sister crying and all these thoughts gathered in my head about abusing her. I spent the rest of the weekend with her knowing that I would never do it, but it wouldn't go away. It's been three years since I had that one thought. I see her on weekends, I'm incredibly detached from ever allowing my recurring thought to become a genuine consideration. I know that. Seriously, please don't offer help about that.. because I can reassure myself I'm not.

All I want to know is, how do I stop thinking about it? Is it guilt that I even thought about it in the first place? Why do my thoughts always trail back to this, the worst thought I've ever had?

Please get back to me

[redhed35]

We all have thoughts at one time or other had have horrified us,but as the situation passes so do the thoughts and we move on to other things that occupy our minds.

The fact that your still worried about this is a little concerning for me as its been 3 years and you still think about it.

You don't say what kind of abuse you were thinking, physical,mental,emotional,sexually,either way,my advice is to speak to your doctor and take it from there.

16 is a transition age from childhood to adulthood where you learn to deal with many aspects of life,relationships,money,family,etc,and it can be an easy process for some and more difficult for others.

Your avoiding your sister now so the thoughts are having an impact on your daily living,time to bring it out into the open and talk about it.

[britmg]

Thanks, this has been helpful, but it could be more implicit if I told you some greater detail. Is there any way in whicih you can email me on [email protected] so I can explain further?

[redhed35]

I'm afraid that won't be possible,and also against the rules of the site.

To get the best from amhd its best to keep all information public so other people can also add and offer advice to your thread.