[DJLyons]

All threads merged into one.


Hi my name is Jeff I am 16. I literally have just signed up on this website not even a minute ago and I have new clue how it works but I joined because I wanted to share my feelings to someone, let me rephrase that something.. I have been in love with this girl since December 29th of 2009 it is now October 7th. Throughout this time I have developed such an incredible relationship with this girl and I find it hard to go a day without talking to her.. in fact the days I don’t talk to her don’t even feel like days. Up until maybe 3 weeks ago things have been getting pretty bad. About a month ago she calls me her best friend now she barely attempts to start a conversation with me. So I have to start conversations with her and I don’t feel like she even cares about me anymore. I can’t think of anything I have done to make her change her attitude against me like she did but I guess it doesn’t matter.. She is literally the most beautiful girl I have ever seen and I am not just saying that because I love her I’m saying that because she’s perfect. Everything about her is perfect. Her laugh, her personality, everything. Back to why I am here.. The more things go south with me and her the more I am feeling depressed. I take this depression out on other people such as family, friends, people in general that don’t deserve it. I have tried to explain this to my best friend before and he says just get her out of your life. I can’t. So please if you have any advice respond to this post thanks.

[Jake2008]

Was this relationship one that you would characterize as a boyfriend/girlfriend? Did you date, and were you exclusive to each other?

My answer will depend upon a little more information as to the nature of the relationship itself.

Thanks.

[joypulv]

Unfortunately teenage love can hit really hard, but can also change very quickly. It sounds possibly not so much that she stopped liking you but that she might have a crush on someone else and isn't talking about it, or some other guy is showing a lot of interest in her and she is intrigued. If you were just very close best friends and had not professed love to her, she might not have known how you feel as well, and had no idea that it mattered a lot how casual she was about drifting away. This is so common, it happens a thousand times a day. All you can do is surround yourself with your friends and make them drag you wherever they go whether you feel like it or not. You could ask her if you could have 10 minutes some day to talk, and tell her that you are puzzled (and hurt, but don't make her feel guilty) and hope she can tell you what happened. If she can't or won't, you have to let it go.

[martinizing2]

How often were you together, not just talking?
What things are going south?
And did she see it as a perfect relationship?

More information will affect advice , as Jake pointed out.

[Ohgoditsjames]

I of all people can tell you teenage love can be hard, I lost my beloved girlfriend who was my best friend for 5years even though she spent nearly a year telling me she loved me. It took us sometime but we got talking and we're as close as we used to be, and on Tuesday she said she loved me to bit, and on Friday she hugged me as usual but said she loved me again, I have no idea what she means but meh. I shared your pain, she cut me out for ages and then re appeared, it really hurt me, since she was my frist girlfriend, and I had only just gotten over this 3year thing I had for a girl. I don't know, do what's best for you, I nearly let go, but I can tell you I'm glad I didn't let go so maybe just stick around with your friends for a while, enjoy it, and maybe she'll let you know what happened. Im still yet to find out why she left me after our first proper day out together where we kissed and held hands and cuddled for the whole day, and her telling me I was everything to her. Believe me do what you think is best for you, you don't want her to hurt you again but you also want her in your life, just give it time my friend.

[DJLyons]

I had a previous question on what I should do about the girl that I love how we're growing apart and I decided to get her out of my life cause I was done having her affect my emotions and making me depressed that she didn't like me anymore after we have been bestfriends for almost a year. But now about 20 days later I'm realizing how big of a chunk of my life was just taken out and thrown away and how much I miss having that person I could talk to and share my actual feelings with now it just seems like there is an empty void. I have a lot of other friends but none I could even come close to connecting with like I did with her. Part of me wants to try to become friends and rebuild the friendship that we used to have and another part of me knows how much of a **** she was being and wants nothing to do with her

[MichelleLee111]

DJLyons,
I think you need to give it some time. It's always really hard to readjust after a break up. If you try to build a friendship it will only make it harder on you because you are still angry at her. You need to create a new lifestyle without her in it. Focus on what you enjoy doing and be open to new friendships. Later after you have created your own life then you could seek her out to see if you could have a healthy relationship with her as friends.
Good luck.

[cuteseb]

I think you still love her but you don't know if you still want to be the best friends that you guys were of the lovers that you guys were. I know may great relationships that that turned out because they started as best friends but I also know may that are awkward because they started at friends and lose themselves and can't get back to where they once stood, as friends. You need to decied if you reallly love this girl more then friends and you need to be go all ten yards to be in that kind of relationship or decied if you just always want to be her best friend, hopefully for the rest of your life. Give yourself time and choose how you really feel.

[gara]

Listen give her a space , long space , being friend with her won't going to do for you nothing , I know you miss some to talk to that under stand every single word coming out from your chest , if it was feelings sad or angry or depress , but man if you became friend with her , I mean you are guy , one day you will sick tired of being just a friend ,and you will forget yoruslef one time and try to kiss her and she will block you away , and will say to you harmfull thing , such as , take it easy we are just friends , and trust me man , that will make you feel sad like ****, man I ben through what you going on right now , I would say , leave her it's over , make her come to you , one day she will come to you asking you for something , at that time you have to show her you are cool of being alone , show her that you are not missing her , girls love drama, if you really go back to her and ask her to not loose her for ever , as lover or friend , it won't help you at all , and the part of being lonely and want some one like her to talk to , you will find it , just try to make a lot of friends , and you will find one girl one day that really desrve you in this mizry life, just be strong and I know you can do it, don't let her shut it down you , you are bigger then that , you are guy after all.

[claytondog]

Been there, pal. It's never easy. In my case I got pissed off, tried to act like she was beneath me, said some stuff to her I regret, and now, 15 years later, I wish I had been more compassionate and mature. Should have just let her go, give her space, and not burned that bridge. In the end, though, I met a new girl, and been married to her for 12 years and have three great kids. Life's not fair but just remember that things turn around eventually. You can't have good times without bad times, light without darkness, happiness without sadness, etc. It's part of life - yin and yang thing is really true. The good news is that when your life feels like it's in the toilet, just hang in there because that is temporary and things will get better. That, and Sam Adams, gets me through the tough times (which by the way don't go away when you get married... hee hee hee).

[DJLyons]

following the previous questions I had I thought I was done with this girl. After following your guys's advice and everything I had little to no feelings for her but the problem is I have school with this girl and I see her upwards of 3 times a day.. so giving her space is not exactly that much of a reasonable option. Me and her don't just ignore each other either if our paths cross we have to act like we weren't the closest person each of us had months ago we just glance at each other awkwardly and then look away.. The thing that kills me and makes me feel like **** though is that she acts towards my bestfriends like we used to act like and she barely even pretends she notices me I wish I could stop having feelings for this girl more than anything but now I'm starting to think that's not going to happen any time soon, any advice is valued

[joypulv]

You didn't take my advice. I said surround yourself with FRIENDS and all you said was that you didn't have any friends you might be attracted to in the same way. That isn't what it's all about. FRIENDS are what get you through unrequited love. You don't need another GF on the rebound or even not on the rebound. Stop thinking that way. Sports, hobbies, music, art, study, a skill. You need a life aside from love anyway.

How many people out of 6.8 billion people in this world do you think have been in your boat or are about to be? About 6 BILLION.

[DJLyons]

The girl that all of these questions were about was at the same party that I went to yesterday for new years.. I left early cause it wasn't that much fun but guess who shows up at my door at 1130 pm last night.. yup the same girl. She claimed that I was in the area in it was two cold and she was drunk. I ended up entering the new year kissing the girl I've been trying everything to get out of my life. I can tell 2012 is going to be a ***** of a year.

[martinizing2]

When you have the feelings for a person that develop in a relationship, they do not just go away.

It takes time.
What you need to do is learn how to deal with those feelings and not let them lead you into doing anything
Foolish.

Feeling awkward is normal in these instances. But it will fade as time goes on.

[DJLyons]

Just saying I have lost all feelings for this girl. Finally..

[martinizing2]

just sayin i have lost all feelings for this girl. finally..

Just sayin' we told you so.;)

Good job , I know it is not easy .
Stay strong and thanks for the update, it is appreciated. And keep them coming.

[DJLyons]

All of the questions that have been asked on this username have been fake. Unfortunately, I forget to mention at the end of all this that this username was apart of my term paper for phsycology. It was used to see how newage teens can reach for emotional advice through the internet. A weird topic I understand, but regardless thank you for being apart of my research. You can stop responding to these questions the website just doesn't let you delete a username and the emails are annoying as hell.

[DJLyons]

All of the questions that have been asked on this username have been fake. Unfortunately, I forget to mention at the end of all this that this username was apart of my term paper for phsycology. It was used to see how newage teens can reach for emotional advice through the internet. A weird topic I understand, but regardless thank you for being apart of my research. You can stop responding to these questions the website just doesn't let you delete a username and the emails are annoying as hell.

[DJLyons]

All of the questions that have been asked on this username have been fake. Unfortunately, I forget to mention at the end of all this that this username was apart of my term paper for phsycology. It was used to see how newage teens can reach for emotional advice through the internet. A weird topic I understand, but regardless thank you for being apart of my research. You can stop responding to these questions the website just doesn't let you delete a username and the emails are annoying as hell.