[Grace12]

Just curious... when in a committed relationship should you be expected to tell your partner everything in regard to the opposite sex and being hit on? This has recently happened to me and I'm not sure how to deal with it. I handled the situation well I think, just making sure he knew I loved my boyfriend and that I was very sorry but nothing would ever happen between us. The problem is that he is a mutual friend of my boyfriend and mine and to tell my boyfriend, I know would upset him and even make him angry. But I feel bad because we tell each other everything and I know if our roles were reversed I would want him to tell me if a girl had come on to him. So I'm a little conflicted here. Is keeping something like that from him a betrayal? Or is it best because I'm doing it to keep the peace? The guy involved is a nice person. I wouldn't want to ruin our friendship with him over something like this.

[redhed35]

The problem is if it happens again and its more serious, your boyfriend may wonder why you did not tell him the first time.

You don't have to make a big deal out of it,just keep calm and cool and state what happened,don't inject any drama into the situation,stick to the facts.

If it was more then a mild flirtation on the friends part I would say it.

[I wish]

IF the situation doesn't escaslate, I would say, leave it alone. Not point creating so much drama. If you're committed to your boyfriend, then keep your distance from the friend if you can't handle it. Why dig deeper?

But if you find yourself more and more attracted to your boyfriend's friend, then you might want to reconsider your relationship, because that's a bigger issue than telling your boyfriend about flirtting.

[mmresd]

If the friend was to make another move, then it creates a pattern, and this should be looked at by your boyfriend. If he is a mutual friend then he should respect what you and your boyfriend should have, and even if he does like you, he needs to back off. You told him no this time, and if he stops because he sees how much you love your boyfriend then there is no need for further discussing this, not even with your boyfriend. But if he keeps persisting, then he is not only disrespecting both of you, but he is being a lousy friend so you can now tell your boyfriend about it since losing that friendship shouldn't be too hard. Especially if he cannot control himself.

Good Luck,

Javi