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bc419 · Nov 24, 2010, 05:47 PM

Okay... I have been dealing with this one for a couple of days... I am currently dating an amazing guy and well, we make a month today... the thing is.. I have a best guy friend and before me and this other guy dated we would do stuff... not sex but everything else. Now that I am dating I have promised myself and my boyfriend I wouldn't ever cheat. But I did. I feel horrible.sick to my stomach. I'm not a bad person but this is terrible of me. I don't know what to do or think of... I tell him everything but this, this is just too unbearable to say because I KNOW he will break up with me :'( please help.

awayandalone · Nov 24, 2010, 06:14 PM

I'm going to be blunt and I don't mean to be mean.

You cheated, regardless of promising yourself not to you did.

Best thing to do is tell him now before he finds out some other way, these things always have a way of surfacing. Better to be honest and upfront with him

If he stays with you, great, do everything you can to earn and keep is trust i.e. don't do it again obviously. If he leaves, cut your losses. For one thing its only been a month not enough time to draw a huge bond. Learn from your mistake and do better next time.

I wish you the best and hope you can find the courage to tell the truth.

ironhide262 · Nov 24, 2010, 06:23 PM

Sorry to say but, I think you need to tell him the truth. In the long run he will respect your honesty and you will be better for it as well.
By the way , what do you mean by cheat? Your post gets a little confusing.

You messed up, now you have to face the consequences and he has every right to break up with you. You need to learn to treat people the way you would want to be treated.

I wish · Nov 25, 2010, 11:28 AM

If you can't do the time, don't do the crime.

You can't trun back the clock, you're just going to have to face the consequences of your actions. I don't know what lead you to cheat, but it sounds like you don't know what you want. Why don't you remain single until you figure out what you want? What do you force yourself to be in a relationship?

As for how you release the feeling of guilt? Time is the answer. With time, it will be easier to sort out the emotions in your mind. The other solution is to break up with your current boyfriend, it's not fair to him. He's living in the dark and you're living with so much guilt. Do both of you a favor and go your separate ways. Leave the past behind and build a better future.

Finally, instead of worrying about the past, I suggest you focus on the future. Focus on being a better person from now on. Treat this as a learning experience. We can't always be perfect. It's more important to learn from our mistakes.