[angelotaku]

Hmmm well there is this guy I met in my freshman year in one of my lunch bells he was sitting w/ no one so I felt kind of bad a couple of weeks later he introduced himself , and we struck up a conversation so I thought "oh he's cool" and so I became friends w/ him via Facebook at my grand parents house ( the only place in my life that has a computer that is not a school computer) well now we're in the same P.E class and health class and he has other friends who are'nt my friends but.. he won't stop following me if he even would see me in the hallway,and if our classe we're on toatally different floors he would still follow me the only reason he doesn't stalk me via Facebook is because he knows that the house I usually stay at does not have a computer. A couple of months ago he asked me if I had a boyfreind (sadly I don't) , I asked my mother about this and she thinks that he likes me, which is scarry because I'm not interested in him in that way ( to me he's more like a kid brother), and I actually have a crush on someone else ( but I don't know if he feels te same way... probably not), I know that I don't want to hurt his feelings , but I also don't wish to date him because I don't love him, and that could cause problems down the road. So how do I let him down gently?

[Eileen G]

Tell him that you like him as a friend, almost a brother, but definitely not in a romantic way, and there is someone else you do like in a romantic way.

I'm afraid you are going to have to sit him down and tell him out loud in words. Boys are not good at reading subtle signals, and unless you say it in words that it's impossible to misunderstand, he may continue to fool himself he has a chance.

He may be following you because he's lonely and he know you'll be nice to him. Try to introduce him to other people who will be nice to him, and to get him involved in other activities besides following you.

[pandead]

Some people don't get much attention from opposite sex, he probably thinks you might like him too. If he asks you, can you tell him like you told us here (I'd certainly avoid the "kid brother" part though) just that you see him as a good friend but nothing more.

I think the reason why he is following you is because he thinks he has a chance with you. What do you mean by "stalking"? Is there anything besides following you at school?

People get rejected every day and they get over it. I'm sure he will be fine. If he makes you think he could be dangerous, tell your mom as fast as you can. Good luck.

[dontknownuthin]

Please know that some things hurt our feelings but we need to hear them anyway. There is no way to tell someone their dog died without hurting them. There is no way to tell someone they have bad breath without embarrassing them. And there's no way to tell a person, "I don't want to date you - I have a huge crush on someone else. I hope we can be cool as friends". We just have to tell people tough things some times.

The best way to protect his feelings is to control the damage by first making it quick and clear and don't drag it out or give him mixed signals at all. Like don't tell him you're busy when you really mean, "I don't want to go on a date with you"... tell him the truth, "I'm not interested in dating you." And don't blab around school and to other friends about him - that's humiliating.

Otherwise, know that there will be a time you will be rejected and it will hurt, and there will be times like this when you have to do the rejecting, and that hurts, too, but that's life.

[mmresd]

Two options, 1. You might want to give this guy a shot, there is never any harm in that. 2. Tell him what you are feelings, he should be understanding of your feelings if he does in fact like you, and whether his feelings are hurt or not, leading him on is never a good option anyway.

Good Luck,

Javi