[MC1103]

My son has not seen his “natural father” since he was around 18 months old, he is now about to turn 7 years old. I've been with my husband since he was about 24 months old, if not longer. We are currently attempting to do a Name Change.

Questions:
:: What will stand in court as proof that we've exhausted all avenues to locating the “natural father”?
:: Can we file for abandonment? If so, how?
:: If I have a standing RO, how can I prove to the courts that he is a danger to my son?

Key facts in our case:
:: Knows my husband as his Dad
:: Live in California
:: Have a standing RO (Restraining Order)
:: Unable to locate him through his last known address and mother (sends letters back as “return to sender, doesn't live here”)
:: Hired a PI who was unable to locate him
:: Has not paid child support
:: We have attempted the Termination of Parental Rights and Adoption with a Legal Name Change but our Lawyer took us for a ride and we exhausted all of our resources with this Lawyer. The cost to have HSA come and perform and investigation is too costly so we are attempting a Legal Name Change and when we can afford it we will continue the proceeding on the Termination of Parental Rights and Adoption. If HSA would do the investigation for free we would not have a problem with continuing down that path.

[cdad]

What standing restraining order do you have and how did you get it?

[ScottGem]

First its not a good idea to piggyback your question on someone else's. This can lead to confusion. You should start a new thread. So I've moved your question to its own thread.

How did your attorney take you for a ride? I would NOT bother with a name change until you can go for the adoption. Your son can go by any name he wants as long as there is no attempt to defraud. Except where a legal name is required.

No you can't file for abandonment, but you MAY be able to use abandonment as grounds for a TPR. But you really don't need it, filing for adoption should be enough. What methods constitute a good faith attempt to locate the father depends on where you are, the one fact you didn't tell us.

[MC1103]

Thank you for beginning a new thread.

Currently reside in California.
We have had him go by my married name since he was around 2 and he does not know his legal name but the school requires that it remains on report cards, images, etc.

[MC1103]

With that said, this is why we want to continue with a Name Change for the time being then proceed with the Adoption once the funds are available.

Thank you for your time!

[MC1103]

I've had a standing restraining order in affect since 2006. This is based off him being abusive, a danger to himself, my son, and myself, and threatening to kidnap my son.

Was granted the RO based on the police reports/records.

[ScottGem]

First please don't use the Comments feature for follow-up, Use the Answer options instead.

This site has some info on the methods you need to use:
Step Parent Adoption in California

I still think you are wasting your time on the Name Change. You will just have to repeat the process and go through the same steps AGAIN with an adoption.

Another idea is to check with local law schools. Many have clinics that will help you prepare the paperwork.

[MC1103]

@ScottGem Thank you for your opinion.

RE: Answer - - While in my dashboard the only option was

comment

and because I am new to this site I did not realize that I need to click on thread in order to post an

answer

.

RE: Proof to Courts - - Lets say we do decide to proceed with the Adoption... do you know what would suffice as proof to the courts that we have exhausted all avenues in attempting to locate the

natural father

. Whether we do the Adoption or Name Change we will/do run into the issue of properly serving him but if he is un-locatable how do we proceed.

We've attempted the following:
:: Internet Searches (eg. Intellius, white pages, etc.)
:: Serving through a PI who was unable to locate him utilizing the information we gave him. Although we provided him with all the information we had he stated that he could not locate him through all of his search options. We searched with all the same information and paid a dollar in one of those Intellius type websites and located his mother.
:: Receiving

Return to Sender. Doesn't Live Here

on returned letters from our previous attorney

It all boils down to the same thing... he needs to be properly served. So if we've attempted all avenues how do we proceed? Or maybe you have another idea on how to locate him? The main question is again, how do we prove to the courts (ventura county) that we've exhausted all avenues in attempting to locate this person?

[ScottGem]

I understand you are new, my instructions were meant to help not criticize.

I did give you a link to some info as well as suggestions of where to get some free legal advice. I doubt if the law specifies what is sufficient good faith effort, that may be a local court rules issue so you need to ask the court.