[johnjohn1]

Can child support be enforced if the "father" recently found out he could'nt father children ?

[mrshodges]

I don't understand your question. Is this person the biological father? What is the situation?

[johnjohn1]

In fact, I'm the one who is paying child support.. I've found out through dr.s that I could never father children.. the child is now 18 in penn, (somewhere) going to school,which I was told I'd have to pay until the child was 21 or finished school... needless to say, I'm pretty bummed about the whole deal.. a few years before, the "ex" stated to severial people that the child was'nt mine, and now has married the "real father"... any suggestions?? Can't afford a good lawer by the way..

[Fr_Chuck]

Where you married to the person at the time ? How was paternity estabished ?

If you were married, then you are assumed the father in most states and ( varies by location) can be held responsible as the father even if not.

[johnjohn1]

Fr-chuck,
In answer to your questions.. yes I was married to the person in question at the time.. as far as determining paternity... can't say, although I was there for the birth.. I'm also aware some states have an "assumed parent" law.. altho I can't see how it could be legal.. the state by the way was Missouri...

[QLP]

Can I ask what has happened to the relationship between you and the child? The way you say the child is is Penn somewhere suggests you two lost touch somewhere along the line. Did contact stop when your ex remarried? Does the child see you as dad? Whilst it is important for you to find out how things stand legally I think it's also important to consider the emotional fall-out. It must be a huge shocker to you to suddenly find out you might have been duped all these years but I'm also worried about the effect on the child you acted as father to.

[excon]

any suggestions ??? can't afford a good lawer by the way..

Hello john:

Sure. You've got a son/daughter right now, and only 3 years left of support. If it were me, I'd keep the kids... You WILL lose them if you fight. I'd rather have kids than money.

excon

[JudyKayTee]

Can I ask what has happened to the relationship between you and the child? The way you say the child is is Penn somewhere suggests you two lost touch somewhere along the line. Did contact stop when your ex remarried? Does the child see you as dad? Whilst it is important for you to find out how things stand legally I think it's also important to consider the emotional fall-out. It must be a huge shocker to you to suddenly find out you might have been duped all these years but I'm also worried about the effect on the child you acted as father to.

This is posted on a legal board. While your answer might be emotionally supportive it does not address the legal issues.

The relationship between father and son has nothing to do with this.

And, yes, the Order very probably would stand as it was written.

If you want to play "let's make a deal," you can always approach the mother and request DNA testing. You won't be the first person who has posted that he has been advised he cannot father children and then found out - surprise! He's the dad!

[QLP]

This was originally posted under 'children', now it has been moved to the legal board I will of course leave it to the legal experts.

Edit: No apology needed Judy, I can see the comments would be inappropriate on the legal board.

[johnjohn1]

all contact stopped after I moved out of state.. b-day, x-mas, etc. cards or gifts I sent were returned torn up or destroyed.. I stopped trying after 3 yrs.and this was BEFORE the ex remarried.. child doesn't see me as dad..

[johnjohn1]

Lost the kid along time before the divorce.. mother turned her against me a month after the divorce..

[johnjohn1]

I found out years after the divorce I could never have kids, because of an injury I got while in the service.. got it verified a couple of years ago through dr.s at the v.a. hosp, and surgens that operated on me last march..

[ScottGem]

First please do not use the Comments feature for followups. Use the Answer options instead.

I suggest contacting a Family Law attorney in MO. MO law is clear that, since you were married to the mother at birth you are the legal father unless challenged. What is unclear to me is the issue of challenging. What I found only refers to children with no presumed father.

You may be able to challenge and even get reimbursement from the actual father.

[johnjohn1]

That's what I figured... how would I go about making a "challenge" on this kind of situtation? Any ideas? I don't really care about reimbursement, pre sae,
All I'd really care about, is for the real father to take responsibility for the child.. I heard it rumored that he "adopted" the child so she could have the same last name.. But then again, I'd also heard it through the grapevine that the father was planning on getting a divorce from the ex.. How would something like that work in an instance like this ? Sorry for the 2part questions...

[ScottGem]

Like I said, consult an attorney who can tell you what you need to do.