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    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 4, 2010, 02:08 PM
    Child visitation
    I am a father that has a 20 month year old daughter from a previous relationship, I filed for visitations and was granted overnight visits 2nd and 4th weekends with my daughter but I want to modify my visits and have my daughter with me and my family 50 percent of the time as well as she is with her mother and her boyfriend 50 percent of the time. The mother does not agree with changed I am asking for and her reason is because our daughter is a girl. I make more money then she does and married with a child on the way . The mother lives with her boyfriend and his parents. Would the judge grant me that?
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Oct 4, 2010, 02:14 PM

    How much money you make has nothing to do with custody. Where she lives has little to do with custody. What matters is what is best for the child.

    Go back to Court and request this change. Present proof that this is good for the child. Do NOT denegrate or criticize the mother unless, of course, she is abusive in some fashion and the child is in danger. I don't know if a 50/50 arrangement would be upsetting to the child.

    I was just in Court, similar situation, and the father got visitation only 6 hours a week. Amazing but there are no overnights or "weekends" ordered. I'm in NY.

    Child is 21 months.
    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Oct 4, 2010, 02:26 PM
    No she isn't abusive to the child. I do feel that our daughter should be able to get the same treatment at both homes. I feel that as well as she spends quality time with her mother and her boyfriends family why is it so harmful for her to spend time with her real father and her real family... The weekends I do get her is not enough time with her...
    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #4

    Oct 4, 2010, 02:27 PM
    Our daughter loves to be over she play and is very happy she do not cry and her mother claims she has a hard time with her but when she is over at my place she listens very well.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #5

    Oct 4, 2010, 03:05 PM

    None of this matters - what matters is what is in the best interest of the child (as I said).

    As far as "why is it so harmful for her to spend time with her real father and her real family" I have no idea why the Court ruled the way it did so I'm not the one to ask.

    She is with her REAL mother and her REAL family now. Nothing makes your side of the family any more "real" than the mother's side. That's not an argument that the Court is going to want to hear.\

    Go to Court, prove it's in the child's best interest to spend more time with you and stay away from emotional arguments.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #6

    Oct 4, 2010, 05:16 PM

    First I would not do or try it without an attorney, some courts do not like to accept modifications but every so many years ( about 2 in some places) unless there has been some major change. But you can try of course.
    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Oct 6, 2010, 06:13 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    The change is that they moved and now were in living in the same county My daughter her mother and her mother boyfriends lives about 15 minutes away from me now.
    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #8

    Oct 6, 2010, 06:14 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Before they lived 3 hours away from me I was working and she had school so she claimed it was hard meeting up half way but for some odd reason she always seemed to end up out here on Friday nights then tell me at the last min. I can pick up my child
    Hwalters12's Avatar
    Hwalters12 Posts: 20, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Oct 6, 2010, 06:15 PM
    Comment on Fr_Chuck's post
    Now that there about 15mins away it shouldn't be any reason that we cannot meet to pick up my daughter more and I see her more.

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