[concerned12]

Here`s a timeline:

-Last week of June we start dating.
-First week of July she goes to another city for the weekend with friends. We weren`t official yet.
-Spend July together.
-Beginning of August, I go to my hometown for a month, so we`re apart. On about the 10th of August, I have symptoms of Chlamydia. I go to the doctor; get a week`s worth of antibiotics.
-Beginning of Sept, return to the city and my girlfriend.
-Second week of Sept, my girlfriend has symptoms of chlamydia. Gets treated for a UTI, but gets worse, so she`s then treated for chlamydia. I get re-tested and come up negative.

We`re monogamous. Both of us got out of long term relationships in February and had no further sexual partners until we met.

But in a conversation with her while she was getting treated, she confessed to me that while she was in the other city with her friend, a man kissed her at a club. She never told me but always felt bad about it. We weren`t `official` then so I`m not mad.

But she did only tell me about this two months after it happened (maybe she wasn`t obligated to tell me, but she felt compelled I guess).

So as I ponder over how one of us got chlamydia, I`m left wondering - maybe this guy she`s talking about, maybe they slept together and she obviously doesn`t want to tell me. It`s strange because when I told I`d contracted chlamydia, she didn`t push it as to how I could have gotten it. She didn`t freak out. She didn`t ask whether I`d had any other sexual partners and she seems genuinely unconcerned with asking - how did we get this?

Should I ask her about this as gracefully as possible? Is it possible one of us had it from our previous relationships?

What I`m worried about is that if she contracted something from some guy on vacation is that she might have contracted something else. And so we need to be checked before having sex.

Any thoughts?

Ps. And we`ve only had sex with a condom so far...

[Enigma1999]

Hello Concerned,

Glad to hear ou two have always used protection. Keep that going.

Here are my thoughts, she admitted kissing another man while you two weren't official. I would think that she would tell you if she did sleep with him. Then again, I don't know.

You could always ask her. I would.

I think you should tell her now that you two are official, that you both should get checked out, a clean bill of health. Nothing personal.

Also, just to let you know, I have made my lovers take a blood test before I even slept with them. They never took it personally. I think that if everyone did this, that would prevent a lot of diseases.

Good Luck.