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New Member
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:16 AM
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I'm 15 and pregnant my babs father smokes weed who would get coustody of my baby
Well I'm 15 years old and I'm pregnant the baby's father is 22 but he smokes pot and I really don't want my baby girl around that his whole familys crazy sister is always in the street &his mom tried to kill herself so many times and his brother has 2 kids but there both bad 1 goes around asking people if they smoke on purple and my baby's father always making the 2 little boys fight and say stuff their not suppost to instead of saying no him and his brother laugh about it.I want to give my little girl something better
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Printers & Electronics Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:25 AM
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Apart from the fact that your boyfriend is guilty of statutory rape of a minor, where do you really want to start this conversion.
Why did your parents allow you to keep company with a guy that was 22!
To begin with, what is the legal age for consent in your State?
The next step for you to take is to either see you pastor or minister for assistance. If you do not have a pastor, go to the Child Protective Services office and get help! Do that now!
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Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:33 AM
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Here we go again, donf. This is not abnormal behavior any longer, so what is happening to our youth ! There must be five or six of posts like this in the last week. I totally agree with your advice regarding talking to the pastor or minister... school counsellor but the best one is Child Protective Services.
Tick
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New Member
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:35 AM
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 Originally Posted by donf
Apart from the fact that your boyfriend is guilty of statutory rape of a minor, where do you really want to start this conversion.
Why did your parents allow you to keep company with a guy that was 22!
To begin with, what is the legal age for consent in your State?
The next step for you to take is to either see you pastor or minister for assistance. If you do not have a pastor, go to the Child Protective Services office and get help! Do that now!
Well my parents allowed it because my dad knows his dad from mexico there really old friends and cps was already investigating us for the same reason that's y I'm kind of scared to go to them I don't want my baby to come into this world and then cps takes her away
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Printers & Electronics Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:43 AM
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Tickle,
One post from EXCON was removed and my post has been edited.
Please stop beating your head against the wall, it will mess your hair. :)
What do you mean by, "Here we go again?" Have we had past debates about this? If so, then I apologize in advance for having forgotten them.
I'm troubled by your statement that this is the "norm" now. It is not the norm, nor should it become the norm. It is abhortant behavior in our society. I can not speak for other societies where it may well be acceptable but it is not here, at least yet.
Do you believe that a child of 15 is ready to carry the burden of parenthood?
I'm not a prude by any means, but it is just morally wrong not to mention legality may be an issue.
Is there any reason that you can use to justify that it is acceptable for someone 22 years old to bed a 15 year old child?
What does Canadian law define as the age of consent?
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Printers & Electronics Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 08:56 AM
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Hayle,
I can understand your being afraid of CPS coming after the baby. But it appears that you already have a concern about them.
I suspect that want to remove you from the situation you are in. They cannot be after the baby yet, because the baby is not here yet.
When dealing with CPS, make sure you present yourself as a responsible person. It is very important that you do that if you have any hopes of keeping your child.
I am against abortion for other than medical necessity. My Lady and I have lost three children during childbirth and that pain never goes away.
I have counseled women who years after they had an abortion still feel the pain. I have also had women tell me how they had an abortion so that they could keep their boyfriends and then the slimes just walked out anyway.
Please understand that you are carrying one of the greatest gifts you will know.
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Dogs Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 09:52 AM
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Since this is in the family law section, I can not offer you and legal advice. But my dear, you are 15!
Do you have any family members, grandparents, aunts, uncles or cousins, anyone you can live with? Is you ex trying to get custody of you baby? Or is he doing this in a spiteful way. The way you have described him, he does not sound like a person who enjoys children or the joys of babies. Just an assumption on my part.
What are your parents saying in all of this? Are you ready to be a single mom, on your own?
I live in Canada, but there are resources here that allow the pregnant mothers to live in special housing, they allow them to go to school, to continue their education, they provide child care for them while they are at school, and offer parenting classes as well. Once the baby is born they have a separate housing, where you would have your own apartment type setting, but still under the rules and regulations of the organization. This organizations allows girls, single moms, to get their education, and be the best that they can be for their babies. Do you think there is something like this in your area?
If you don't mind offering the state you love in, I would be more than happy to look into this for you.
This post is breaking my heart. No time left to judge and point fingers, she came here for help, which is a step in the right direction.
This is a link to the place I was describing, have a look.
Villa Rosa Inc. - Villa Rosa Inc.
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Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 10:18 AM
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 Originally Posted by tickle
Here we go again, donf. This is not abnormal behavior any longer, so what is happening to our youth !
...
 Originally Posted by donf
Tickle,
... I'm troubled by your statement that this is the "norm" now. It is not the norm, nor should it become the norm. It is abhortant behavior in our society. ...
Hopefully you're right and it's not the norm in our society as a whole. It simply is the norm in this forum perhaps.
But one sees so often the terms "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" as meaning "the person I am living with, and have children with", that one wonders whether "norm"-al people even consider marriage anymore.
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Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 11:30 AM
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Either way, let's keep the thread on the idea of advice to the OP, and not on the social ills of this day and age.
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Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 11:33 AM
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Hi donf, I think you miscontrued my reply to you, I in no way inferred that you had missed something. I was referring to, as I said, many posts in the last week with young women being involved with older men. Why would you think I find this acceptable? The age of consent here is just about the same as in the US. Why would that be an issue here? An older man is just as likely to be charged with sexual interference in Canada as down there.
As for the comment about beating my head against the wall, even with your smiley face attached to it, I find that offensive. So you have something against older, relatively intelligent, professional women beating their heads against a wall.
I see parental mistakes with this 15 year old written all over her post.
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Ultra Member
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Sep 23, 2010, 11:39 AM
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I agree with bella on this. I can't even imagine your baby's father is going to want custody anyway. Get yourself together and approach child protective about your situation. This is also my opinion but maybe they can find a better life not only for your baby with you there also.
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Expert
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Sep 23, 2010, 12:23 PM
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I have refrained from commenting, but feel I need to.
Have you considered adoption?
Many adoptions today are open, so that you can keep in touch with your child and get updates from the adoptive parents.
I cannot imagine that at 15, in a household where your parents were okay with you dating a 22 year old, that you are capable or have the support needed to raise this child at this point in your life.
Believe me, I know that adoption is hard, and that you may be under social constraints to NOT think of adoption. But can you really deny that it might be what is best for your BABY? Isn't that what being a good parent is, anyway---doing the right thing for your child?
Please, please think about it. I honestly don't think that you are in a place right now where you will get the education, support, and finances available to be the best parent to your child--and don't you think your child deserves that?
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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Sep 24, 2010, 05:46 PM
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Have you seen a doctor yet? Its very possible your physician will have to report this. And CPS will get involved.
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