[maitebear]

I been dating the perfect guy for about a while now. Our anniversary was yesterday. He walked 6hours just to see me! We felt so comfortable around each other. Had a lot of fun. But he didn't tell his dad he was coming. So once he had charged his phone he contacted his dad, he was mad but told him to start walking back at 6am, but he came to pick him up instead 2 hours later that night. I haven't heard from my boyfriend. His phone is off. Is it likely his dad took his phone?? Or is he ignoring me? ="( we have never fought or anything. So I'm really upset. My friends say if he would walk that far for me it means he really loves me.. and that he will contact me a,s,a,p. is that true??

[Enigma1999]

Hello matiebear,

My guess is that he was grounded. Based off your story, if his Father was upset, then perhaps he was.

How old are you guys?

It doesn't sound like any thing that YOU did wrong to make him not have contact. Your friend is correct, he did walk 6 hours to see you, which also tells me he didn't clear it with Dad.

[maitebear]

But what I don't understand is that his dad never seems to care until now.. he is 18 and I am 17. He would ask his dad to drop him off for at least an hour since they drive by my town every weekend on their way to his grandma's.. does his dad think I will ruin his son's life or something?? :( this just really upsets me because this is the longest we haven't talked since we met.

[Enigma1999]

Do they have a land line at their house? Perhaps you can try calling there. Just too see if he is OK. If this is not in his nature, then I would call his house? If his Father answers, and won't let you speak to your boyfiend, then in a tactful nice way, you can ask,"have I done something to upset you?" That's if you are comfortable doing that.

[maitebear]

No they do not have a land line. My boyfriend told me when we were hanging out that his phone is like a leash to his dad. That he can always contact him on it. Because after all he goes to his friends all the time and also has football after school... is it likely he will give his phone back to him very soon??

[DG]

I agree with Enigma, sounds like he got in trouble for not telling his dad were he was going.
His dad was probably worried about him .cause he did't know were he was at. Being a dad I would have been,
When it all cools down it will probably be okay.

[Enigma1999]

Has he always cleared it with his Father before going to your house? Did he ask his Father if he could go to your house that day?

His Father, to me anyway, sounds like he was very worried about his sons safety and where he was. He could have grounded him from his phone and/or going any where except to school and home.

You could always go to his house and to knock on te door.

[maitebear]

Why does his dad choose this time to become a parent? He has never really been there besides to put a roof over his son's head.. he always told him he is an ungrateful child [etc.. ] we live an hour away by car. And I'm not allowed to go over there. Yes he asks his dad if he can some over all the time. But his dad always says yes then lies to him and says he didn't say anything.. he even told his dad and friends he was going to walk over. But nobody seemed to believe him. His dad should be in his life more so realize what is going on through his head. I don't mind if I can't see him anymore. Just aslong as I can talk to him on the phone everyday. Like we did before this incident occurred.

[Enigma1999]

How come you're not allowed to go over there? It seems like there are more issues here, other then him being grounded.

[talaniman]

He probably is grounded, and has no way to call so be patient and see what happens. Can you write him a letter, or a post card? Old fashion I know, but there is no reason to worry, and let your mind get you carried away.

[AnnaAikee]

He must really care about u to walk this way its possible his phone was taken away, but if not he could just be a little miffed, its healthy to just get a little mad everyonce in a while. Don't worry if he cared enough about u to walk alll that way he will deffinetly get over it just give him like a day that should be fine

[maitebear]

My mum does not like the thought of me dating a "white" boy... so there for I am not allowed to go over at all. He did contact me.. saying he loves me and that he will try to keep contact for the next few weeks. And that he does not want to break up. He actually asked me to marry him. I said yes. But no wedding till after we have our goals in life planned. Meaning college first. Play later...

[maitebear]

Im just afraid that this time apart and not talking much will cost his love for me to change :( I do not want to lose him :"( I never had a real relationship. He is my first everything!! I won't be able to lose him.

[talaniman]

Your in high school, you have a world waiting for you. Even if you lose this love, your first, another will be along, and another, so don't trip so hard over the first one. What will be will be, that's just a reality of life.

Just so you know, real love finds its own way, no matter the obstacles. So lighten up a bit will you!

[cdad]

why does his dad choose this time to become a parent? he has never really been there besides to put a roof over his son's head.. he always told him he is an ungrateful child [etc..] we live an hour away by car.

This statement bothers me. From the sounds of it he's not paying for his own cell phone. Makes me wonder what is really going on. How come he doesn't have a car or job? Since dad is providing it then he may very well be ungrateful. CHildren are not entitled to anything above food and shelter. The rest is perks. You not entitled to nintendo's nor cell phones. So he should feel lucky.

[maitebear]

Welllllllll... I guess I shouldn't care anymore... he changed his number. & I didn't get it. He was really ignoring me.. and was defiantely not in trouble. Grrrr.. oh well. Its part of life, right?