Check out some similar questions!

kate718 · Sep 13, 2010, 12:45 PM

I am in College and my roommate who is also my very good friend has a boyfriend and that all she cares about. Before she had her boyfriend we did a lot of stuff together and now we don't do much. She is with her boyfriend everyday all day. She sleeps in out room and that is about it. When we are all in the room and I say anything they don't hear me they are in their own world. All they care about is themselves. WHen we do all get to hang together its gross because he is like crazy and like just does weird things. I feel I am loseing a friend and I can not take it any more. Her idea of us hanging out is when we are in class together and when we eat our meals and when we do homework. When we do all hang out they do not see anyone or know that anyone else is their. THey live in a world where it is just them and that's it.

JudyKayTee · Sep 13, 2010, 12:50 PM

I don't know that her behavior is all that unusual. If it's disruptive to your sleep and/or study, request a new roommate. Eventually people will drop out and perhaps you can be moved.

You think she's ignoring you; she probably thinks you are needy.

Looks like you need to make new friends at college.

Maybe she'll break up with this guy, maybe she won't - but if she's this obsessed, probably things won't change.

I don't see that they live in a world that's just them - are they going to classes? She goes to classes with you, eats with you, studies with you. She just makes other arrangements when it comes to her social life - although you do say that you hang out together. If you feel he does "weird things" it's possible they both feel your dislike and avoid you.

Do you date and/or have a steady boyfriend?

kate718 · Sep 13, 2010, 12:56 PM

Yes I have a boyfriend who I am going to be married to. He lives three hours away form me right now

JudyKayTee · Sep 13, 2010, 02:10 PM

Then you should understand what your roommate is going through in the beginning of what may be her first "real love."

Find new friends. Good luck on your impending marriage.

kate718 · Sep 13, 2010, 05:40 PM

OK well thanks

JudyKayTee · Sep 13, 2010, 05:42 PM

Let "us" know what happens next - if/when she breaks up with him she's really going to need your friendship.

First College loves are tough!

kate718 · Sep 13, 2010, 05:59 PM

I feel she is going to lose me before she breaks up with her boyfriend

JudyKayTee · Sep 13, 2010, 06:27 PM

That's what friends do - they hang in there. I have a friend who has dated a succession of losers. I bite my tongue and eventually that relationship is over - and then she finds another loser and it starts all over again.

But we're friends...

kate718 · Sep 13, 2010, 06:33 PM

Well I feel I just can not take it anymore

answerme_tender · Sep 14, 2010, 11:38 AM

Well if you can't take it move on. In a relationship you have to be willing to give and take. Even with girlfriends we have to be willing to keep our mouths shut and hope that if it's a bad relationship, they will recognize it themselves, or we make a choice to stay as far away from situation as we can. Being a snooty judgemental roommate who feels that only her relationship with her boyfriend has any value isn't the girlfriend way to be.