[mzconfused]

I really don't know where to begin I am 25 years old and I am dealing with this 29 year old guy who mistreats me and doesn't respect me at all. I met him last September on a chatline he was so nice and sincere and he would do just about anything for me. My apartment wasn't ready so he basically took me in under his wing and now he treats me as if I don't even exist He talks to me like Im a dog I moved into my apartment and he moved in with me. On February 14th this year he left me because I didn't feel about him like he did about me. When he left my laptop came up missing and so did he I was in the bathroom with the door shut and it got so quiet a little too quiet so I went to see what was going on because he's usually loud. He was gone and some of his things was gone too. I called the police and made a report on what he had done and he was no where to be found when he was called out about it he lied and had a good aliby I guess. I was very confused about what had happened and I had no one or nothing to back me up on getting my laptop back so I just took my losses. I called him up and said that I was sorry for hurting him by not feeling about him the way he did about me. He came back but he changed I mean really really changed he started being very disrespectful to me calling me names yelling at me and then he finally put his hands on me the first time it was a bruise on my side because he was tryna grab me and the second time he strangled me and said that he didn't remember doing it them the second time he did it again he has a lot of people watching my house when he is not in site I am very afraid if him I told his grandmother what he had done and she said that he doesn't need to be hurting me but he still does I am having anxiety attacks and he doesn't even care. I do love him and I do what ever I can to help him he has 2 daughters and I give him money to pay for them and their not even my kids so he has got 100.00 from me since March 2010 He treats me bad I don't go anywhere with him anymore like I use to. If I threaten to go to the cops he will try to kill me or have somebody else to do it for him I don't know what else to do he has got me afraid to do anything about him what do I do about my situation. When I help him out I don't have enough to pay for my expenses and he doesn't even care as long as he gets what he wants he's good he has become very destructive and I can't stand it anymore I am so very depressed and I can't deal with how he is treating me He just keeps on hurting me and he will never stop and I really don't know how to keep myself safe everything I say or do makes him angry what can I do to keep myself safe

[kaka67]

Walk out the door and don't come back.

Get your ID, wallet etc and just leave. Do not go where he will find you and report him to the police.

He will not change and you are at risk.

DO not keep in contact. Delete him from everything. Change all your passwords for everything you have online incl Facebook.

If you do not leave he will choke you again and you may not be so lucky this time.

Don't tell him. Just go.

[phantomlrp]

Go to the police. They can get you an emergency order of protection if the circumstances warrant it or you can obtain one from the courts during normal business hours. If this person has assaulted you recently he should be an in custody arrest. If it wasn't recent then honestly he will probably just be referred for charges.

This is a dangerous situation and it will only continue to get worse. Take action now for you own safety.

Find a safe place to go right away then call the police and explain what has been happening between you two.

[kaka67]

I hope everything's OK?

[smitapatil]

Indeed. Don't mess around with a person who is not in control of himself. You can find better companionship elsewhere. YOu are young and life has lots to offer. Focus on your own development and forget about boyfriends for a while. YOu will find you attract better people once you let this one go.

[answerme_tender]

What is there to be confused about---You are being abused. You obviously have a computer look up a woman shelter, then get out of that apartment. And for goodness sakes don't start calling him again. Most men who abuse a woman will never stop-no matter how many times they say their sorry and will never happen again. Its time to stop being a victim and move on to being a survivor. Learn how to put your own welfare first. Let the women's shelter help you, they will answer any question you may have just give them a chance.