[Bocephus9351]

Long story. My wife and I had been having a lot of problems and was already considering a separation. This new girl I've known her all my life and went to school with her and hardley ever talked. We seen each other one day and later we agreed it was love at first sight. She is recently divorced also and lives with her two boys that really have a problem with anyone but their father. I know u can't make anyone love u but just this morning she said she adored and loved me but when I ask her to go somewhere with her and maybe her kids she says she's not ready for that now even though we have already did things together like that. I just don't feel good enough for her. That's the way it makes me feel anyway. She will come over on the weekend and will sit and watch a movie and whatever else happens and then it's like u shot her out of a canon when she's "finished" I really don't want to give up on her because she's truly the only person I've ever loved this much. She can make me feel so loved and wanted one day and then the next she doesn't acknowledge me. Love shouldn't be this way and I've asked her what's wrong but she just changes the subject. She's a wonderful good hearted person I just think she's confused. Idk what to do. I've tried just not talking to her but I just keep going back. I know cheating on my wife was terribly wrong and I'm not trying to defend that but this woman has really moved my soul. I'd give anything to be able to wake up with her beside of me. Maybe I'm just not used to being alone and I'm trying to hold on to her just to have someone around. It's all very confusing.

I asked for a divorce from my wife to be with her and she swears she loves me but wants more time. Now I'm all alone. Should I run?

[Bluerose]

You have been a silly guy but if divorce was so easy to bring up then maybe it was going to come about sooner or later. It sounds like the other woman needs more time to get over her own divorce and is afraid of jumping back into the fire. Back off a little and give her and her boys some time to work things out. You could be a good friend if you are prepared to take a step back. It does sound like your own marriage is over. Is there any chance you would want to go back there? Do you have children? This other woman has her children to think of and take care of, and even if you do end up together you must know that you will never have her all to yourself. She's probably glad of your company but pushing things may scare her off.

[talaniman]

You are so obsessed with replacing what you had that you are needy, and pushy.

Why not take care of your real business first (failed marriage), heal properly, and learn to be happy being alone, before you try to rebound into another relationship strictly because you need company to get through a hard time.

You both have issues to be resolved as individuals, before you even can think of being in healthy relationships.

[Devorameira]

You need to step away from her and allow both of you the time to heal. Seems like you're rushing things.

It's obvious that she's just not ready and definitely not sure about your relationship. If she was she would be introducing you to her children and be moving forward.

[Bocephus9351]

Pushy and needy says it all. I'll never be able to have her being that way. I need to get ahold of myself. U can't rush these things. I've just gave up everything for her and I just sit around waiting for her to call. It's really pathetic.

[Bluerose]

You need to take some time for yourself now and figure out what you want. It's never a good thing to rush into a new relationship even if you thought you were with her. It takes time to get over a divorce - a lot of time before you find your own feet again.