[BlueEye]

I am in highscool and I would love to have a boyfriend,I am a cheerleader,and I'am on the volleyball team.But there is one problem (MY PARENTS AND GRANDPARENTS)!! I have worked really hard to have my social standing at my high school.And now I feel its all for nothing I have never really had a real boyfriend before because of them...
I'am always getting hit on by guys at school,but its like their wasting their time because I feel my parents are so over protective of me.It seems they just want me to hang with girls,and boys that are in the fam.
I am getting so sick of feeling like this its like this part of me is lonely.I have many friends,but its this one guy I like and he has always been so nice to me(he gose to my school)I have known him for a long time.(His fam is friends of mines) but what's the point of friending him... If my over protective parents want give me room to get to know him better! Like we could go to the movies,mall,or hang out after the game together(He is on the football team.
I think my grandparents should just stay out of this because I don't see why this should be their prob!! Not so much my grandmother,it my grandfather he is really old timeded and thinks a boy only wants one thing... (I'AM LIKE *** I'AM OLD ENOUGH TO HANDLE MYSELF)"I could never say that outloud though...
Second PROBLEM-My best friend kind of likes this guy to and I don't won't this to ruin our friendship.But I'am so tired of being the one who lets people get what they what want first and worry about the way I feel later! I feel like I just want to cryout and let everyone know the way I feel.

[cdad]

If your parents know this boys family then maybe you can speak with your mother and later father and express your feelings. But try it their way. Always chaparoned and always in groups with no alone time. They may accept that with those conditions and allow you to get a start.

[FoxCash]

Did they know about your last boyfriend that was going to propose to you? If so, that may be why they are protective of you. You're too young to settle down and get married.

And to be honest, while you feel you can take care of yourself there are times and issues where you may feel pressured or unsure. It happens a lot when teenager's hormones are running wild, stress, or lack of experience.

It even happens to adults who have been experienced. When the heart gets involved we sometimes ignore our own minds.

Your parents and grandparents simply care and are showing concern. Believe it or not, they were your age once as well. And understand the thing that go on including emotionally. Maybe try to have a sit down with them. Explain where you're coming from and let them explain where they're coming from. Try to meet in the middle and go from there with it.

[KBC]

You are a teen.Attractive apparently.Your parents(and other authority figures) are 'holding you back'.

Wow,this must be the first time I have EVER seen this on ANY site..

Sarcasm aside!

The harder you try to compete with the 'friend' who 'also likes' this person,the more you will try to fight your parents,etc.

Think of the future,not of the present.You are a success in you desire to be 'socially accepted' and now you think you deserve a reward?

A boyfriend(in highschool) may or may not be a 'reward',especially one you are looking for.

Friends are made by exposure to each other, not alone time,per-se,but time with other friends, like Califdad referred to.Under conditions like a chaperon,an older sibling, someone your parents TRUST to make decisions you may or may not make correctly(in their minds, and most adults,I might add)

This is a time of experimentation for young adults(like yourself),to make a bad decision which you might pay for for the rest of your life because your parents didn't take precautions(or care enough about you to take any) would be improper and irresponsible.

If you have to PROVE you can be trusted, you STILL need to be looked over by your (caring and responsible) parents.

There is a whole lifetime to'have a boyfriend' (I understand,your peers are'with' someone and you want to feel the same thing)The best thing your family is doing for you is exactly what they are doing.IMHO.

Don't take my word for it, I am just another adult.. see the medical boards on "Am I pregnant",or"Is this an STD",perhaps "Why does this hurt so much",in the relationships category.

You might learn a thing or 2 on the other boards..

Hope this was helpful.

KBC

[asking]

BlueEye,
Harsh words here. You have got some kindly answers. I'm going to be a bit more direct. Lots of teens post here, and you are coming across as more selfish and less mature than average. You may be mature in other ways, but in this post and in others I looked at, you seem completely self absorbed.

For example, you don't seem to really see how wrong it is for you to try to steal your best friend's boyfriend; you seem to feel that a boyfriend is a reward for having "social standing," which you claim to have earned through hard work. Cheerleading is hard work? It seems as though you are the center of attention every where you go, but that's not enough for you and you can only think about the things you don't yet have--in this case, your best friend's boyfriend. I don't know if you are a Christian, but the Bible says not to covet thy neighbor's wife. This applies squarely to you.

A boyfriend is not a thing to be added to your collection of status items, like an iPad. From your other posts, it's clear you are allowed to go to parties and you clearly have time to socialize at school and at football games, so the idea that you are somehow under lock and key and can't see other kids long enough to form a friendship is unpersuasive. Exactly what is it you need to be alone with your girlfriend's boyfriend to do?

If you are really serious about him, tell your friend you are going after him and you can't be friends with her anymore. At least be direct, open and honorable about your covetousness.

But don't expect not to suffer consequences. I think you are biting off more than you can chew and that if you did have a boyfriend, you wouldn't know what to do with him. Your job now is to learn to think of boys as people, with respect and tenderness. Right now, it seems like you are more bothered by the fact that your girlfriend has something you don't have and you think that makes you look bad.

One last thing. Any high school senior can be a gentleman and nice for an hour or two. What does it say about him that he's kissing his girlfriend's best friend as soon as his girlfriend is gone for 10 minutes? Why would you want someone like that? That's not what a "gentleman" does.