[sugar_babe]

My best mate is pregnant but she is only 16 he boyfriend is 17 she asked me to help her tell him the only problem is they broke up a few month ago I don't what to put preasure on him but he has to sort this out to I really worried about her to its like she's deppressed or something he doesn't want totalk to her and I think when he finds out her will freak out should I help or just leave it?

[Devorameira]

He really does need to be told about the pregnancy, after all he is going to be a Dad, but she really should be the one to break the news.

If she needs you to go along for emotional support, I'd be all for that, but the actual news needs to relayed from her.

[Jake2008]

It is imperative that he know, as soon as humanly possible. He has created this life, and has to step up and do what he needs to do. That includes helping with the pregnancy, Doctor appointments, prenatal classes, and saving for expenses, including upon the cost of the birth, depending where you live.

Regardless of what is right or wrong in how he is told, he needs to be told. This isn't about anything other than the well being of this baby to be. It is not in the baby's interest to deny knowledge of the impending birth, to the father.

Your friend has asked you to help her tell him. You can say yes, or you can say no.

If you decide to say yes, there are different ways you might be able to go about this.

If your friend cannot face him, or he will not meet with her, enlist the help of her parents first. Maybe the parents can help by getting it out in the open in a mature, calm way.

If that is out of the question, suggest that your friend write a letter to her ex boyfriend, and explain simply that she is pregnant, and they need to talk about what is in the best interest in the baby, as to expenses, planning, etc. It's really too bad if he's feeling a bit of pressure, he made the baby, he has to step up.

She can register it in the mail system, or you can deliver it to him. But, of course it would be preferable if she met with him face to face.

Maybe that can happen if the parents are involved, and everybody can sit down together and figure out who's going to do what, and when. There will be a lot to figure out.

In the meanwhile, the longer this goes on, the longer she is denying the father what he should know. It really doesn't matter how he takes the news, or that he likes it or not, but he needs to know, for the sake of the baby.

I should think that she'll be showing soon enough. Time to get the cards on the table.

[answerme_tender]

If you can't get through to eithe one of them, how about their parents, the future grandparents of this child she is carrying. Perhaps they can provide some support that they both will need to go through this. If you feel uncomfortable telling either of their parents face to face, write a letter and don't sign it. The development of this unborn child should be first concern. Good luck!

[JudyKayTee]

This is an adult situation and that's how it should be handled - anonymous letters should never be taken seriously.

I agree 100% with Jake - she's 16. Her parents need to get involved because they are ultimately responsible for her and, possibly, the child. Up front and personal with her parents is the way to handle this. If OP needs to visit the parents to discuss this with them, then that's what she can do.

I assume the parents know - ?