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    questionboy8379's Avatar
    questionboy8379 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Aug 15, 2010, 06:27 PM
    I initiate all plans in the relationship... Is this a problem?
    Since the beginning of my relationship with my boyfriend, I am always initiating plans. He works a lot and he is always tired so I am getting to the point where I am feeling that A. he is too tired to want to do anything or B. he doesn't want to be bothered with me. Now I know B. sounds a little drastic but I can not stop feeling this way. Would it be bad just to stop asking for awhile to see what happens? We have been together for almost 6 months and we are already looking for a house together. If he did not like me I do not think he would be going through this process. I rack my brain and take it so personally. I feel like I put sooo much into the relationship and get nothing in return but phone calls. He is younger than me and he is not happy with his job so I am sure this all plays into my craziness. I want to stop feeling like this is a one sided relationship. Any advice or pointers would be great!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Aug 15, 2010, 07:49 PM

    Stop taking things so personally and please slow down as this young, new relationship has a ways to go before you make such a leap as a house together. So far you have yet to develop communications to see if you can work together as a couple and overcome many obstacle that life throws at you.

    Be a lot more patient and do a lot more talking. What's the hurry? I would take at least another 6 months before making that kind of commitment.

    Too much, to fast, crash and burn, and that's where your headed without a better understanding of each other.
    questionboy8379's Avatar
    questionboy8379 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Aug 15, 2010, 08:04 PM

    Thanks for the advice. Honestly I was shocked that we were talking about it so premature into our relationship. I'm not against waiting though.

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