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    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #1

    Jan 8, 2007, 09:01 PM
    What should I do now?
    Hi All,
    I love a person very much but unfortunately my parents don't like intercast marriages and fixed my marrige with some other girl.Emotionally I did as per my parents and got engaged but now I want my love back.but now I am not in a position to do so as I am engaged.I love my girl most.
    Please suggest me what should I do now?
    rads's Avatar
    rads Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #2

    Jan 9, 2007, 02:44 AM
    Its not too late yet because your not married officially, tell your parents the truth and get married to your true love, as long as your happy your parents will be too. And besides you are the one that has to live with her not your parents so you have to be happy with the relationship. So stop waisting time and go get your true love!
    rol's Avatar
    rol Posts: 804, Reputation: 162
    Senior Member
     
    #3

    Jan 9, 2007, 02:59 AM
    Tell your parents in a firm way that you cannot marry that girl, and break the news to the other girl you are supposed to marry and tell her that you are in love with someone else.

    The subject of arrranged marriages is coming up here more and more often...
    In India are marriages starting to become more westernised? Are people choosing more and more who they wish to marry?
    Are people that afraid of their parents wishes to stand up for who they want to marry and love?

    For me its amazing and almost unreal, that solid marriages can be based on astrological birthdates +familes and education.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Jan 9, 2007, 07:22 AM
    Either do as you wish or do as your parents say, that up to you but you do what you feel is right, after all who will be sleep with this female the rest of their lives? Do you want a happy marriage or do you want to please your family? I believe in being honest with others AND myself.
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #5

    Jan 9, 2007, 09:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    Either do as you wish or do as your parents say, that up to you but you do what you feel is right, after all who will be sleep with this female the rest of their lives? Do you want a happy marriage or do you want to please your family? I believe in being honest with others AND myself.
    Hi,
    Thanks for your reply and helping me but my parents and girls parents have done all the preparation for marrige.The news has spread all over.If my parents now refuse to marriage its going to be a very big problem for my family.
    Please show me the way out.
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #6

    Jan 9, 2007, 09:40 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rol
    tell your parents in a firm way that you cannot marry that girl, and break the news to the other girl you are supposed to marry and tell her that you are in love with someone else.

    The subject of arrranged marriages is coming up here more and more often....
    In India are marriages starting to become more westernised? are people choosing more and more who they wish to marry?
    Are people that afraid of their parents wishes to stand up for who they want to marry and love?

    For me its amazing and almost unreal, that solid marriages can be based on astrological birthdates +familes and education.
    Hi,
    Thanks for your reply and helping me but my parents and girls parents have done all the preparation for marrige.The news has spread all over.If my parents now refuse to marriage its going to be a very big problem for my family.
    Please show me the way out.
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #7

    Jan 9, 2007, 09:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rads
    its not too late yet coz your not married officially, tell your parents the truth and get married to your true love, as long as your happy your parents will be too. and besides you are the one that has to live with her not your parents so you have to be happy with the relationship. so stop waisting time and go get your true love!
    Hi,
    Thanks for your reply and helping me but my parents and girls parents have done all the preparation for marrige.The news has spread all over.If my parents now refuse to marriage its going to be a very big problem for my family.
    Please show me the way out.
    He_comes_with_baggage's Avatar
    He_comes_with_baggage Posts: 36, Reputation: 2
    Junior Member
     
    #8

    Jan 9, 2007, 11:09 PM
    Just tell everyone this is a big step right now an I thought I was ready for this But I'm not. This is to soon. An then just tell your girlfriend the truth Because its not fair to her either. You have to be honest with her to. An tell your parents what's up an why your not ready to marry her. Tell them you would probably get divorced anyway its waste of money lol . Anyway Good Luck!
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #9

    Jan 10, 2007, 04:57 AM
    Your inability to act on your own behalf has sunk you. Bet you never thought that she may not want to maarry you either and if you had been honest and presented a united front you could have made things different.
    rol's Avatar
    rol Posts: 804, Reputation: 162
    Senior Member
     
    #10

    Jan 10, 2007, 06:10 AM
    <<Thanks for your reply and helping me but my parents and girls parents have done all the preparation for marrige.The news has spread all over.If my parents now refuse to marriage its going to be a very big problem for my family.
    >>
    If you decide in 6 months that you want divorce this will be a bigger disgrace!!
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #11

    Jan 10, 2007, 08:29 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by talaniman
    Your inability to act on your own behalf has sunk you. Bet you never thought that she may not want to maarry you either and if you had been honest and presented a united front you could have made things different.
    Hi,
    So you r saying I should convey my thoughts to that girl so she can refuse to do marriage with me.
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
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    #12

    Jan 10, 2007, 08:31 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by rol
    <<Thanks for ur reply and helping me but my parents and girls parents have done all the preparation for marrige.The news has spread all over.If my parents now refuse to marriage its going to be a very big problem for my family.
    >>
    if you decide in 6 months that you want divorce this will be a bigger disgrace!!!!!!!
    Hi,
    So you r saying I should convey my thoughts to that girl so she can refuse to do marriage with me.Can you tell has got created our destiny.
    AKaeTrue's Avatar
    AKaeTrue Posts: 1,599, Reputation: 272
    Ultra Member
     
    #13

    Jan 10, 2007, 08:46 PM
    I think what Talaniman was saying is that had you been upfront in the beginning, you may have learned that the girl you are to marry may not have wanted to marry you either and it would have been easier to get out of the marriage then.
    It looks and appears to me that you made your decision to please your family since you didn't stand up for what you believed in at the beginning and now you want an easy way out. Truth is, there is no easy way out for you now. You must make your mind up with which direction you are going to go and be prepared to face any consequences that may follow.
    I do wish you the very best luck in what ever you decide to do.
    Kae
    abhishekshukla's Avatar
    abhishekshukla Posts: 10, Reputation: 0
    New Member
     
    #14

    Jan 10, 2007, 10:42 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by AKaeTrue
    I think what Talaniman was saying is that had you been upfront in the beginning, you may have learned that the girl you are to marry may not have wanted to marry you either and it would have been easier to get out of the marriage then.
    It looks and appears to me that you made your decision to please your family since you didn't stand up for what you believed in at the beginning and now you want an easy way out. Truth is, there is no easy way out for you now. You must make your mind up with which direction you are going to go and be prepared to face any consequences that may follow.
    I do wish you the very best luck in what ever you decide to do.
    Kae
    Thanks for reply.
    rol's Avatar
    rol Posts: 804, Reputation: 162
    Senior Member
     
    #15

    Jan 11, 2007, 02:00 AM
    <<Can you tell has got created our destiny.>>

    How can we tell?? Sometimes you have to create your own destiny.

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