[jmfs1234]

My girlfriend and I met on a dating site 2 years ago. After 6 months of only friendly conversation we met personally and fell in love. I proposed after a few months. I ended up changing jobs so we could be together, and we lived together for 8 months. At this stage she saw that I had some old pictures of vacations with my ex-girlfriend, and was jealous and asked me to delete them, which I did.
I expected her to do the same, although I did not ask. I found out that she actually kept all her ex-boyfriends pictures, as well as chat conversations and emails. She told me one ex-boyfriend kept emailing her and asked me if she should reply or ignore, and I advised her to ignore and block it as replying would probably keep him emailing, and also because she said she had no feeling or even friendship with him.
Anyway, she kept everything even after I told her that I did not like that she still had all of that in her computer. After a couple of months I found more pictures that she had downloaded from a 2 year old stored phone.
Again it made me upset to know that she was still collecting or organizing, instead of deleting, or storing and ignoring the pictures.

Now I am feeling threatened that she might not be really serious about us although we are supposed to get married next year and she mentions I am the one, the love of her life. We are living apart for professional reasons and she went to work on a cruise ship, which was an old dream.

Is there anything I can do to appease myself? Should I demand that she deletes it all? Should I demand that she quits that job? I don't think we will make it through 6 months without seeing each other - because I worked in cruise ships and know that there is a lot of social pressure, together with loneliness and pressure to mingle, and I feel hurt knowing she will rather be there than with me, even though we are supposed to marry in 8 months time...

[lickemlolly]

Sounds like you need to answer some questions before you walk down the aisle... 1. have you talked to her about the photos? Asked her why she keeps them asked her to delete them? Second if you think that you cannot last 6 months apart then why on earth are you getting married? A strong rship stands the tests of time... you feel that she should give up her job because you don't think u can make it through?part of being in a rship is trusting the person you are with... communication in a rship is key and it sounds as though you are lacking a little on that right now.. you should really sit down and have a serious talk with her... explain how you feel

[slapshot_oi]

Since the job she has is a dream job, I doubt she'll quit and making that request will most likely be used against you.

You never asked her to delete the pictures, only that you didn't like them. Ask her to delete them, and if she still doesn't after you already did, then you have problem.

[talaniman]

If your getting married in 8 months, you should be working together to define the rules between you and be able to communicate with each other. Do so, and find out what she thinks.

I doubt she will give up her dream job though so don't demand just ask and if her words and actions don't match, sorry guy, but don't get married.