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sierrasmith · Jul 17, 2010, 11:05 PM

I have a one year old with a guy who's father is a convicted sex offender.Her father also has a criminal record. I have kept him from seeing her for a year because of this fact and also because he was violent towards me and verbable abusive. I am so afraid if he gets involved in her life she will be hurt badly by him and his father .I want my baby to be safe and I can't stop thinking about what would happen if I have to go to court for this and he gets visitation. A little advice would be nice

mommyof309 · Jul 18, 2010, 01:20 AM

You can put a pfa (protection from abuse) on him to prevent him from going near you and your baby and that should be enough where he can't get visit or be around the both of you and if he does gets visited (unlikely with pfa) then he would be supervised. Don't qoute me but this is what happened to a friend of mine

cdad · Jul 18, 2010, 01:46 PM

Originally Posted by mommyof309

you can put a pfa (protection from abuse) on him to prevent him from going near you and your baby and that should be enough where he can't get visit or be around the both of you and if he does gets visited (unlikely with pfa) then he would be supervised. dont qoute me but this is what happened to a friend of mine

This is a law board and your answers need to conform with the laws of the pravailing state or general accepted law. Please try to keep that in mind when posting on this board.

cdad · Jul 18, 2010, 01:48 PM

Originally Posted by sierrasmith

i have a one year old with a guy whos father is a convicted sex offender.Her father also has a criminal record. i have kept him from seeing her for a year because of this fact and also because he was violent towards me and verbable abusive. i am so afraid if he gets involved in her life she will be hurt badly by him and his father .I want my baby to be safe and i can't stop thinking about what would happen if i have to go to court for this and he gets visitation. a little advice would be nice

You need to file for custody. In the court documents you need to get a restraining order against the mans father (reason is obvious) and if the father of the child is a danger to the child you can ask for supervised visits. But its not forever. If he does well under supervision he can work his way out if it and into reguler visitation.

sierrasmith · Jul 18, 2010, 05:24 PM

Originally Posted by califdadof3

You need to file for custody. In the court documents you need to get a restraining order against the mans father (reason is obvious) and if the father of the child is a danger to the child you can ask for supervised visits. But its not forever. If he does well under supervision he can work his way out if it and into reguler visitation.

And what of his volent nature. He is also showing signs of a sex offender himself and was raped as a child will the court consider this. There must be something I can do to keep that man from distroing my baby .She has a wounderful future a head of her and in an instent it could be taken away by him.

ScottGem · Jul 18, 2010, 05:37 PM

This has to be asked. Did you know his history and issues when you had sex with him? I have to scratch my head when we have women in here who want to protect their babies from the men they slept with! It boggles my mind that women sleep with such men. How much time were you with him that his history and temperament was not know when you slept with him?

I bring this up because the court will look at this when it comes time to determine custody and visitation.

You should be able to keep the grandfather from your child, but keeping the father from getting visitation will be harder.

cdad · Jul 18, 2010, 05:53 PM

Originally Posted by sierrasmith

and what of his volent nature. He is also showing signs of a sex offender himself and was raped as a child will the court consider this. there must be something i can do to keep that man from distroing my baby .She has a wounderful future a head of her and in an instent it could be taken away by him.

The supervised visits are for the child's protection. I thought I made that clear.

JudyKayTee · Jul 18, 2010, 06:55 PM

Every time there's a custody fight the husband is a pervert and the wife is unstable. Go figure!

sierrasmith · Jul 18, 2010, 09:49 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

This has to be asked. Did you know his history and issues when you had sex with him? I have to scratch my head when we have women in here who want to protect their babies from the men they slept with! It boggles my mind that women sleep with such men. How much time were you with him that his history and temperment was not know when you slept with him?

I bring this up because the court will look at this when it comes time to determine custody and visitation.

You should be able to keep the grandfather from your child, but keeping the father from getting visitation will be harder.

I agree with you completely I was 16 years old when we met (and had sex) through time he told me about his father and they had me convinced that it was not true. We stayed together for 4 long years and throughout those years I was beaten by him and abused.There was also an insedent with his father. So I know what you mean when you say why do wemen do such stupid things (meanless to say I was a child at the time and have wised up ) well I was 17 when I got pregnant and 18 when I had my little one. I am 21 now and have a mess to clean up. I want to do right for my baby and keep her safe

sierrasmith · Jul 18, 2010, 09:57 PM

Originally Posted by califdadof3

The supervised visits are for the childs protection. I thought I made that clear.

You also said that in time he will get reg. visits that's what I meant by the comment. If regular visits mean that he will take her with him alone then that's scares the hell out of me and that's what I am willing to do anything to prevent

JudyKayTee · Jul 18, 2010, 10:30 PM

Then PROVE he's a danger to the child - that's the only way to keep him from having visitation, including unsupervised.

sierrasmith · Jul 19, 2010, 01:22 AM

Originally Posted by JudyKayTee

Then PROVE he's a danger to the child - that's the only way to keep him from having visitation, including unsupervised.

Thanks for your help, really ,I have been dealing with this for a year now and have not gotten any answeres until now. However I fear that I have a ways to go until I'm curtin no harm will come to her. She should not have to suffer for my past mastakes.

ScottGem · Jul 19, 2010, 04:29 AM

Originally Posted by sierrasmith

i agree with you completly i was 16 years old when we met (and had sex) through time he told me about his father and they had me convinced that it was not true. We stayed together for 4 long years and throughout those years i was beaten by him and abused.There was also an insedent with his father. So i know what you mean when you say why do wemen do such stupid things (meanless to say i was a child at the time and have wised up ) well i was 17 when i got pregnent and 18 when i had my little one. i am 21 now and have a mess to clean up. I want to do right for my baby and keep her safe

Ok, so you were taken advantage of. I have to say this then. You made some bad choices in your life and I'm afraid your daughter may suffer for them.

The best advice I can give you is to get a good lawyer who can do their best to keep these people away from you and your child. The good news is that showing this man had sex with you at a young age will help.

I would also suggest you get some counseling and guidance so you can learn to make better choices in the future.