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    poolqueen's Avatar
    poolqueen Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jul 11, 2010, 09:18 AM
    Step kids
    This is our second marriage on both sides. We have been married for 1 1/2 months. We both have two kids... boy and girl and both sides. My kids are adults while his are 11 (the boy) and the girl is 13. The problem is he want's to be his kid's friend and doesn't expect them to follow any set rules. We came home after work to find they had eaten two tubs of ice cream, that would provide at least 6 bowls of icecream from each, plus drank 1 case of pop. I was furious and we had a huge fight. He didn't see anything wrong with it. We love each other very much but I can see our marriage coming apart over this. Help!
    redhed35's Avatar
    redhed35 Posts: 4,221, Reputation: 1910
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    #2

    Jul 11, 2010, 09:32 AM

    This is something you both should have talked about before you got married,how in ever what to do now.

    You and your husband need to sit down and decide on a plan and set rules for the house,write them up and post them on the fridge.

    Rules of the house,chores assigned,the works.

    Then sit with the kids and let them know what you both expect from them.

    But the most important thing is that you and your husband our a united front.

    Close ranks if you have too,at 11 and 13 you can still pull it back,at 14 and 16 it will be much harder.

    Plan family days out,have fun too,but the rules on the fridge are the LAW in your house.

    Let the kids know about punishments,example,if you don't do your chores you don't get to see your friends on Saturday,if you are disrespectful something of yours gets taken away,example playstation,phone,TV...

    Be straight up with them and follow through,don't let it be a week thing,it has to continue.

    Kids will thrive on rules and bounderies,when they know what to do and what to expect.

    One more thing,you are the adults here,you make the rules.

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