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    mgmeadors's Avatar
    mgmeadors Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 19, 2010, 04:41 PM
    So how do we get over daughters who hate? What is the answer?
    I didn't marry well but had 2 children. My children didn't like their father and begged me to divorce him. They even asked me to pray with them that God would give them a new dad because he threw fits of anger and it scared them. They cried a lot and I also cried and suffered panic attacks. I lived with this man for 22 years because I had no education and no way of earning enough money to get away. Finally my mother moved out of her house and bought a new house so there was a vacant house and I had a key to it. So I packed up as much as I could and moved with our best china, our TV, and all the nice home interiors we had. I transferred the cable to this house. After I got everything arranged my oldest daughter decided she was not coming. This really scared me and the panic attacks got worse. Then my daughter said I am trying to ruin her life by disconnecting the cable at her dads house. The stress levels rose. I asked a friend at work to come stay with me and he agreed. Then my daughter began calling me an adulterer and a sinner. This little girl that begged me to divorce her abusive father is now calling me a sinner. It has been 2 years now. No Christmas, No Easter, No Valentines Day, No Mothers Day and I wasn't even invited to her wedding last week. I love my daughter but now she has my younger son calling me a sinner and now he has gone back with his dad because he thinks I'm evil and neither one of my kids will talk to me. What do I do now?
    Wondergirl's Avatar
    Wondergirl Posts: 39,354, Reputation: 5431
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    #2

    Jun 19, 2010, 04:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by mgmeadors View Post
    I asked a friend at work to come stay with me and he agreed.
    I got stuck at this point in your story. Please tell me (us) more about this friend.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Jun 19, 2010, 04:56 PM

    The problem you did not leave when you should have before the cycle of abuse, the cycle of control got set into their mind.

    So are you divorced, are you living ( sleeping in same beg) with a man you are not married to ?

    Don't mean to sound mean but if the answer to those are yes, then by religious standards you are living in sin ( but again that is your business)

    20 years ago was when you needed to have left, the kids got trained to accept or expect this from him and you taught them it was expected to live with it. They accepted his behavior as correct, you taught it to them by staying when they prayed and begged you.

    So I will be blunt and hurtful, you are paying the price now for your inaction then. Only time may change these
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,325, Reputation: 10855
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    #4

    Jun 19, 2010, 05:05 PM

    Darn kids. Leave them all alone, and build a life that you enjoy without them. Finish your education, and be happy for a change. Everyone around you is without YOU!

    They are doing there thing, and so should you.

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