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cdior · May 28, 2010, 04:15 AM

I'm 21 and my boyfriend is 21, we have been seeing each other for about 5 months now, and its going great! but I have a bit of a problem :(, every time my boyfriend touches me on the clitoris he can't seem to make me climax, I find it really embarrassing & I feel bad I can't climax for him, I have made him orgasm but for me I find it hard just in that particular place, I have showed him how I like it, but I can't get my head around how I can not orgasm for him can't anyone give me and hits on maybe how I can or any methods I can use.

Please help! Me
Candice

CravenMorhead · May 28, 2010, 07:59 AM

All right. I think I know what you're asking. You can get him off. You can get yourself off. He can get himself off. He can't, however, get you off. You've showed him and he just can't seem to get it right.

Practice makes perfect. Let him start and take over for a bit. It wasn't too hard for me to get off my ex-wife like this. It is nigh impossible to get my GF off this way, though that is due to other issue we believe.

Subtle corrections, physical or audible will probably be your best bet. "Right there!" "A little to your left" "It isn't a scroll wheel dear." "Okay, concentrate on the Hood, not the .". If he is really going off the rails then move his hand and where it is good. Hell use his finger to stimulate him.

Don't be afraid to take over. I love watching my GF getting off. Take care to sooth his wounded pride if you do this.

Catsmine · May 28, 2010, 11:14 AM

Another possibility is that when you're together you're spending too much attention on the destination and not on enjoying the ride. With some people such performance anxiety can cause functional problems if left unidentified. Kudos to you for asking for help.

My advice would be to slow down on the "fore" and add some more "play."

cdior · May 28, 2010, 05:33 PM

Thanks you Craven Morhead I will try that :).

To catmine I do suffer from anxiety so maybe that's why? I feel comfortable with him 100% but I feel so bad when I don't, I know it's bad but I have racked it once or twice just to make him happy it bad and I shouldn't :(, do you think sometimes some men might rush it and try really hard to simulating the women?
This is my first ever boyfriend so I'm really new to this.

cdior · May 28, 2010, 05:36 PM

"Faked"not racked sorry typo

Synnen · May 28, 2010, 05:39 PM

You have to STOP them from rushing.

If you're being rushed, that's probably why it's not working.

The biggest sex organ is the BRAIN. He needs to get into your head before he can be at ALL effective in your pants. Slow him down--foreplay should be fun.

cdior · May 28, 2010, 11:09 PM

I have noticed that there is a typo in my subject matter, it's meant to be, I "can't" orgasum when my boyfriend touches me, my apologizes to the readers.

LJDK · May 28, 2010, 11:26 PM

Its most likely a case of trying to orgasm. In the beginning of my relationship me and my fiancé placed huge emphasis on making her orgasm. This prevented her from doing so.

Eventually we got so tired of trying to do that, we just started doing it for the fun. And whalla, she was getting there in no time. But 1st you have to come to the t-junction where its no longer an option to "fake" or pretend you do not want to get the Big-O.

Alternativly, just have sex, and rub your clitoris while he slides in and out. That's always good fun.

davedavidson · Dec 2, 2010, 06:52 AM

Yea it definitely sounds like you might be making too big of a deal out of trying to climax, leading to a vicious circle. I had this exact problem with one if my partners, she was worrying about not being able to orgasm, and trying to orgasm and it was stopping her from just relaxing and enjoying it. It is very much in the mind.