[gone4good]

I think that I was recently involved with a narcissit but I would like many opinions on the topic. So me and my ex have broken up 2 times now. Both were from him, although later I realized that I tried leaving him those days but it got turned around to me begging him to stay. The first time it only took him two weeks so come crawling back to me. I took him back. Even though during this time of our break up he was saying very mean things about me and that we would never be back together. He even slept around with three different girls over those two weeks. But, I loved him and didn't know about this disorder then. So we got back together and things were fine for awhile then got worse again. The first time we broke up work was not very good for him (and he has a lot of toys so he needs to work). When we got back together I didn't want to move fast but we convinced me to move in with him, buy a boat, buy a quad, etc. Then work started going bad again, he started getting moody again and we broke up. After we broke up it was the same pattern. He would tell some people we were on a break, some that we would never be together again, and some that he just needed time and space. (Our friends are the same people so I hear everything). He would just tell me that he doesn't want a girl friend right now and I can take that as I want it. Either the door is open or I could move on. For the first two weeks of us being broken up we slept in the same bed. He said we could still both live in the same house but different beds. The night before he actually moved his bed he woke me up telling me he loves me and missed me and hugged me. The next day he moved the bed and said that never happened the night before. Now he is going out of his way to be mean to me. He is telling random lies about me, making our friends think I am crazy, staying out all night, drinking and partying (which isn't what he normally does). One day he randomly text me that we will never be together and to get over him and that I am a baby. Now I am just so confused. He told our room mates that he is moving out because I won't leave him alone! Its been almost a month and I haven't seen him at the house or talked to him barely. When he talk he is just mean! But awhile ago he told me that he will always love me and he can just hide his feelings. I have been asking around and people tell me it sounds like he has NPD. What do you think?

[floaton]

It sounds like he's secretly insecure and weak so he tries to make you feel that way instead. He may just want to get his claws into you so that he can feel in control of you. He may a narcissist but he is definitely not worthy of your patience and affection.

[whuddupcuteface5]

This man is abusing you emotionally and mentally. This type of personality is not good for you to be around, or what you deserve. He will not help you grow or help your life in anyway. He will only pull you down. Promises... his mean nothing. He is very controlling and find ways to manipulate you into doing things you never wanted to do. The best thing to do is to forget about him and live your life. He is bad news.

[asking]

Don't waste another minute analyzing his behavior. Is he a narcissist? Is he abusive? Is he a sociopath? All three? It doesn't matter. This is a person who will ruin your life. Move out and move on asap. Let him say whatever he likes. Keep your head up.

[talaniman]

Bask in my day we didn't try to analyze and fix things so much. Either you can work with someone or you can't.

Rather obvious you are caught up in trying to figure him out, but the time and effort would be better served by asking YOURSELF why you keep going through this with him, over and over again.

Now the answer to that question may set you free.

[asking]

I strongly urge you to either have him move out or else you move out. Living in the same house or apartment with this man is bad for your health. You need your own space. I would also start finding some non overlapping friends, or at least ask your friends not to report to you everything he says (and don't ask them for information either).

[SManns]

A person with NPD has very little empathy for others and will make you feel like a child for having feelings. They will make you feel weak and out of control. I am married to a man with NPD; it is exhausting always stroking his enormous ego. A person with NPD needs that kind of affirmation because they are very insecure and are jealous of those that appear to have what they want. They will also use the people around them to get what they want, and when they reach their goal they no longer need them; a fair weather friend. He is treating you like a TOOL, SAVE Yourself!