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anonymus me · May 17, 2010, 02:21 PM

My dad left because he said he wasn't happy.. I understand but I miss him so so much.. everything reminds me of him and then I cry uncontrollably :(... he works a lot and lives far away sure I see him when I can but I really miss him :(

JudyKayTee · May 17, 2010, 02:26 PM

I realize you have a lot of problems and issues in your life - have you tried counselling of some sort? It's difficult with your parents split up and one moves away.

How often do you see him? Do you keep in touch by Email or telephone?

cdad · May 17, 2010, 03:24 PM

You might want to look here for more understanding and to know your not alone.

Ref:

KIDS' TURN www.kidsturn.org

twinkie15 · May 17, 2010, 03:36 PM

:D:D
You should just hope for the best and if things don't turn out as you planned it's probably for the best.

JudyKayTee · May 17, 2010, 04:27 PM

Originally Posted by twinkie15

:D:D
you should just hope for the best and if things dont turn out as you planned it's probably for the best.

What? How is this helpful and how old are you? The OP needs help and support and I'm not seeing that.

EDIT: I just checked your other posts. You are 10. Why are you on an adult board?

Jake2008 · May 17, 2010, 08:17 PM

Although it is sad not to have your dad around, with time, you will fall into a routine of seeing him regularly. The more that happens, the more you will realize that he is just a phone call or email away. Hopefully with summer holidays coming up, you can spend more time with him. You will feel better about all of this I promise you.

I don't know how old you are, but when my parents separated, I was 12, and to this day, I remember my dad putting his clothes in his car and driving off. I didn't see him again for another five years, and he made it clear that his new family didn't appreciate me calling.

I have wondered if it would have been different if there were things we have today to keep in touch. Texting, email, skype etc. Who is to say that as much as we lament about these electronic devices, they do play a role in keeping people in touch with each other, and it's instant communication.

I hope that you will spend some time every day, with an email to your dad. Just tell him about your day, what you've been up to, the good and the bad of getting used to him being gone. Allow him the opportunity to respond and let you know that your communication is important. Keep this going, and you won't feel so lonely for him.

But it is a loss for you, it is a loss of how things were, and relationships have changed. It is never easy to adjust to such a drastic change in your life.

But, you will get through it, and with a little effort you will maintain a strong bond with your father that will never change.

Cheer up. It will get better.

anonymus me · May 26, 2010, 02:23 PM

Thank you all for your responses . I reallly admire you all for that. I keep in contact with my dad.. phone calls and texts everyday and he gets a break from work every second weekend . That's the only time I see him . I just miss seeing him around the house and knowing that he'd be there after school.. I just have to get used to it I know ,its just so hard when I think back to not so long ago and I really thought we were OK ,I guess not... he left because his feelings changed and he was unhappy .He wants to be there for my mum and be her friend but she hates him now, maybe that'l change ,I don't know but he does make a huge effort to see me . I just feel so alone sometimes :(

JudyKayTee · May 26, 2010, 02:25 PM

You have to remember that his feelings toward YOU didn't change. His feelings toward your mother changed. Unfortunately, you are getting swept up in the aftermath.

I'm sure you do feel alone. Is there anyone you can talk to?

And hopefully your mother will talk to someone or simply get over her anger before it poisons her.

anonymus me · May 28, 2010, 01:22 PM

Wel yes there are people to talk to but honestly they'll never understand

cdad · May 28, 2010, 01:48 PM

Originally Posted by anonymus me

wel yes there are people to talk to but honestly they'll never understand

As I said before your not alone. So there are plenty that will understand. That is what that whole site was about. The feelings you get can be all over the place but the main thing is don't bottle yourself up. If you need a straight talk with your dad then do so. Just make sure to realize that there are many persons like yourself and there are many in the wings that are willing to just listen. So don't beat yourself up over this and don't blame yourself. This is a situation that you can not control. So go with the flow and understand that your feelings will change and its normal.

jmjoseph · May 28, 2010, 03:35 PM

My father died in 2000. I think of him several times every day. You keep in contact with your father. You will be out on your own one day soon. Things will get better if you both want them to.

I know there's nothing that could come between me and my two sons. They are 8 and 5 now, and I have promised to be there for them until the day I die. And that's a promise that I plan to keep. I'm pretty sure that your father feels the same way. But sometimes changes in relationships, jobs, life in general, prevent the relationship to be constant. You should write down all of your feelings, and send them to him.

God bless.

anonymus me · May 31, 2010, 01:28 PM

Okay.. thank you :)

anonymus me · Jun 4, 2010, 08:19 AM

Originally Posted by califdadof3

As I said before your not alone. So there are plenty that will understand. That is what that whole site was about. The feelings you get can be all over the place but the main thing is dont bottle yourself up. If you need a straight talk with your dad then do so. Just make sure to realize that there are many persons like yourself and there are many in the wings that are willing to just listen. So dont beat yourself up over this and dont blame yourself. This is a situation that you can not control. So go with the flow and understand that your feelings will change and its normal.

.. thanks